Unemployed since September 2025
I’ve been unemployed for a while, and honestly, I’m struggling. Looking for some genuine advice.
I took a career gap because I genuinely believed in myself. I was confident that I could crack a good opportunity, and I was also very ambitious about where I wanted my career to go. That was the main reason I decided to leave my job.
Since then, I’ve completed Striver’s A2Z DSA Sheet, covered several System Design topics, and have continuously been preparing for interviews.
From 2025 until now, I’ve probably given 100+ interviews, but unfortunately, I haven’t been able to convert any of them into an offer.
I’ve tried almost everything I can think of:
- Applying on LinkedIn, Naukri and other job portals
- Cold emailing recruiters
- Cold calling
- Reaching out for referrals
- Preparing DSA and System Design
- Travelling to Bangalore for opportunities
- Continuously improving my interview preparation
Every morning I wake up, search for opportunities and start applying again. But after doing this for so long, it honestly feels like nothing is working.
The hardest part isn't even the rejection anymore. It's the self-doubt that comes with repeated rejection.
There are days when I feel extremely frustrated and stuck. I constantly question whether leaving my previous job was the biggest mistake I made.
I’ve also started feeling ashamed about the amount of money my father has spent supporting me during this period. I’ve stopped talking to him as much because I feel like I’ve disappointed him and that he has lost his expectations from me.
Some days I genuinely feel like crying.
I know there are many people who have gone through long periods of unemployment, and I know I’m not the only one experiencing this. But when you're going through it yourself, it can feel incredibly isolating.
So I want to ask people who have been in a similar situation:
What did you change when your job search wasn't working despite putting in months of effort?
Should I completely change my strategy? Focus on a particular type of company or role? Work more on projects/resume/networking? Stop applying blindly and focus on referrals? Something else?
I’m not looking for sympathy. I genuinely want to understand what I might be doing wrong and what I should change.
If you’ve been through a similar phase and eventually got out of it, I’d really appreciate hearing what worked for you.
I’m still trying. I just need to figure out what I need to do differently.
Jobadvisor
- Do aggressive mock interviews: Stop practicing solo. Use peer mock platforms (like Pramp or Interviewing.io) or record yourself speaking your thought process aloud.
- Focus on the "Why" in System Design: In System Design, junior-to-mid engineers often fail because they regurgitate standard architectures (e.g., throwing Redis at everything) without grounding decisions in trade-offs, cost, or operational complexity.
- Prioritize mid-sized/bootstrapped companies and service firms: Late-stage startups and mid-tier firms value immediate execution over pure LeetCode trickery. An immediate offer at a stable mid-size firm breaks the gap and restores your confidence.
- Build one real, non-tutorial project: Instead of standard full-stack boilerplates, build something deployed with active logging, monitoring, and live users. Talking through real production problems in an interview sets you apart from candidates who only solve practice problems.
- Talk to your father today: Call him not with an excuse, but with radical honesty: "I'm working hard, but it's taking longer than expected, and I felt ashamed. I just wanted to tell you I appreciate your support." Parents are far more resilient than we give them credit for. Breaking the silence will instantly lift a massive mental weight off your shoulders.
Mid 30s, did everything right on paper, and I'm completely lost. Anyone been here?
Throwaway account. Sorry in advance for the length.
I'm in my mid 30s and I feel like I spent fifteen years being good at things that added up to nothing.
The resume: professional doctorate in a healthcare field, engineering degree, MBA from a top program. Each one took years. I did all of it because I believed that if you stack enough of the right credentials you end up somewhere good. Nobody tells you what happens when you get to the end of the stack and there's nothing there.
Roughly how it went:
Got the clinical doctorate and practiced for a few years. Didn't love it, so I did the MBA and moved into industry. Spent about 18 months at a medtech startup and left, because I was fine at the strategic parts and bad at the day to day execution. Took an exec role at another startup that turned out to have serious legal problems I wasn't willing to be attached to, so I quit. Started my own small software company around the same period and it failed, mostly because I hired overpriced developers and then lost momentum. It didn't really die. I just stopped. Then a stint in venture that was never a real paid seat.
After all of that I went back and started a residency, basically thinking maybe I'd been wrong about clinical work and the answer was to specialize. I left partway through. That's when it finally landed that I don't want to practice at all, and that I'd only gone back because it was the safe thing my training pointed at.
Now I run growth for my family's business. It's real work and I'm useful there, but it's 20 to 25 hours a week and the whole thing is being sold in about nine months. After that I have nothing.
Here's the part that complicates everything. My family has a lot of money and they support me. I have never had to finish anything, because there has always been a soft landing and I have always taken it. I know exactly how that sounds. I also think it's most of the explanation for everything above.
Some other context:
I live in a small town where the median age is basically retirement. I don't have friends here. Not "a few friends." None. Everyone I speak to in a given week is family or works for the family business.
I want a partner and eventually kids. I'm aware that clock is real, and it is not happening where I live.
The thing I actually enjoy is building. When I make something myself I'm happy. Two weekends ago I built a card game and a small compliance tool, both purely for fun, and I finished both of them. That is more than I can say for anything I've done that had money or a title attached to it.
I'm jealous of engineers at startups. They make things, the work is interesting, they're building something real. I also know nobody hires a late 30s doctorate/MBA as an engineer.
I've spent the last five months generating ideas, evaluating them, making plans, and executing none of it. I've talked it through with family, with friends, and honestly with AI chatbots more than I want to admit. Everyone gives reasonable advice. I don't do any of it. That's the actual problem and I'm aware of it, which somehow makes it worse.
I'm tired. It feels like all that effort bought me nothing, and it's hard not to feel like I spent the best years of my life doing homework. I have every material advantage a person could ask for and I'm more stuck than people I know who have none of it. I know I don't really get to complain about that, which is part of why I'm posting anonymously.
What I'm actually asking:
Has anyone been genuinely lost in their mid to late 30s and come out the other side? What changed? Was it a decision, a person, therapy, moving somewhere, or just time passing?
If you've had money and no external pressure, how did you get yourself to do hard things? Every structure I've tried to impose on myself I've quietly abandoned within a few weeks.
Has anyone moved to a new city alone at 35+ specifically to have a social life and date seriously? How long before it stopped feeling terrible? I'm looking at Atlanta and Dallas but open to anything.
Anyone leave a credentialed track to go build things instead? How did you make that jump, and did the degrees help or did they just sit there making you feel like you owed them something?
Is the answer just to pick something and stay in it for five years even if it doesn't feel right? I keep waiting for something to feel obviously correct and it never does. I'm starting to suspect that's the whole mistake.
Not looking for sympathy about the money, I know that part is enviable. I'm asking people who have actually been stuck how they got moving again.
Jobadvisor
- Stop planning in secret: You do not need another idea evaluation framework. You need skin in the game.
- Ship micro-projects with social deadlines: You built a card game and a compliance tool in two weekends because there were no stakes, expectations, or credentials attached. Apply that exact framework to small software products: build them in 48 hours, launch them publicly on Product Hunt or Twitter/X, and let strangers evaluate them.
- Stop asking for permission to be a builder: With an engineering background, healthcare doctorate, and MBA, you are extraordinarily rare—if you stop trying to fit into standard corporate boxes.
- Target Technical Product Management (TPM) or Founder-in-Residence roles: Look at healthtech, medtech, or biotech startups where domain expertise is non-negotiable. You don't need to write production backend code to "build"—you can lead product development where your healthcare clinical knowledge, business acumen, and engineering baseline overlap seamlessly.
- Move immediately: Do not wait for the family business sale in nine months. Pack up and lease an apartment in Atlanta, Dallas, or Austin for 12 months.
- Expect the first 90 days to feel uncomfortable: Moving alone at 35 feels awkward. It stops feeling terrible around month six if you build a routine centered around community—join local builder meetups, co-working spaces, run clubs, or adult sports leagues. Atlanta and Dallas both have massive healthtech ecosystems, vibrant social scenes, and large populations of professionals in their 30s.
20M trying to leave my warehouse job and start an actual career- where should I start ?
I’m 20 and currently working as a package handler at a warehouse making $18/hr. I took the job because I needed income and wanted to start saving, but I already know I don’t want to stay in warehouse work long-term.
The schedule is also rough. I’m working early morning hours, around 1–9 AM or 2–8:30 AM I have a inconsistent schedule one min we’re working 2 to 8 next min my whole schedule is changed to 1 am. The job itself is manageable but everyday it’s hell standing around and everyone moving slow, also the schedule and work environment are starting to wear me down.
My bigger goal is to move out, get my own apartment, become financially stable, and eventually have an actual career instead of constantly jumping between entry-level jobs.
I don’t have a college degree or a specific career picked out yet. I have a high school diploma and some work experience (Walmart/stocking and now warehouse/package handling). I’m willing to go to school, get certifications or start at the bottom somewhere if there’s a realistic path to eventually making decent money.
Any advice would be appreciated also I’m in TX.
Jobadvisor
3 High-Impact Pathways in Texas
1. Skilled Trades & Industrial Maintenance (Fastest Path to $25–$35+/hr)
- Best Roles: Electrician apprentice, HVAC technician, Plumber, or Industrial Maintenance Technician.
- How to Start: Look into Registered Apprenticeships where you get paid to learn on the job. Alternatively, 1-year certificate programs at local community colleges or Texas State Technical College (TSTC) lead directly to high-paying jobs.
- Why it works: You get off night shifts immediately, earn a paycheck while training, and enter a career with clear progression to $70k–$90k+.
2. Supply Chain & Logistics Operations (Leveraging Existing Experience)
- Best Roles: Logistics Coordinator, Freight Broker Associate, Operations Supervisor Trainee, or Commercial Driver (CDL-A).
- How to Start: Look for internal growth pathways at your current employer or competitors for daylight/first-shift supervisor positions. Consider short certification programs like APICS Certified Supply Chain Professional (CSCP) or obtaining a CDL through a employer-sponsored program.
- Why it works: Your warehouse experience counts as relevant background, making it easier to transition without starting entirely from scratch.
3. IT & Tech Support (Best for Desk-Based, Daytime Roles)
- Best Roles: Helpdesk Technician, Desktop Support Specialist, Junior Systems Administrator.
- How to Start: You don't need a 4-year degree. Self-study and pass the CompTIA A+ certification (takes 2–4 months of dedicated study). Pair it with basic networking knowledge (CompTIA Network+ or Cisco CCNA).
- Why it works: Entry-level helpdesk jobs typically start around $20–$22/hr with fixed daytime schedules, setting you up for rapid jumps into cybersecurity or system administration.
Free Texas Funding & Resources
- Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act (WIOA): Visit your local Workforce Solutions center in Texas. WIOA provides grants that cover 100% of tuition, books, and tools for eligible high-demand vocational programs (trades, IT, logistics, healthcare).
- Texas State Technical College (TSTC) "Get-a-Job" Guarantee: TSTC offers specialized technical programs across Texas, many with money-back employment guarantees.
Your 90-Day Step-by-Step Action Plan
- Fix Your Schedule First (Days 1–15): Talk to your warehouse manager or request a transfer to a consistent daytime shift (even if it means a slight pay hit or moving to a day stocking role at another company). Consistent sleep is non-negotiable for studying or interviewing.
- Visit Workforce Solutions (Days 15–30): Schedule an appointment at a local Texas Workforce Solutions office. Ask them directly about WIOA funding for local trade apprenticeships, CDL programs, or IT certifications.
- Pick ONE Path & Commit (Days 30–60): Choose between Trades, Supply Chain Management, or IT. Focus all your free energy on that single path rather than keeping all options open.
- Build a 12-Month Financial Cushion (Days 60–90): Keep living frugally while in your $18/hr job. Do not move into a new apartment until you have completed your training/cert and landed your first career-track job with predictable hours.
Employee making my work miserable but she can get away with it since she is related to the boss
I am so paranoid about this employee stalking me that I will not even given specifics in this thread. To keep it brief, I work maintenance at a business with many locations(I am the only maintenance worker)
There is an employee, let's call her Carol, who stalks my movements and wants to know where I am at any time I am at her location. If I go onto the roof to look at the HVAC system she is wondering why I am up there and why it took so long. If i step out to pick up something from a hardware store, she wonders why I left the building. It is endless and nobody else behaves this way towards me at the company.
Why is this allowed? Because Carol is related to someone very high up in the company. She now has direct handling of my scheduling and using my PTO on my schedule if she thinks for a second I wasn't doing my job. She can also alter my schedule that greatly benefits her. And when I am scheduled for her? All she has me do is clean(something that was outlined in taking the job that is not my responsibility)
I have a year and half of nasty messages from her both in the company messaging system and private text messages. She is often not showing up to work but tells the boss that I am the one not showing up to do work. I have proof that she is the one telling me she isn't coming in that day and proof in form of images of work I was focused on during some days. I plan to take all this to my HR but I don't expect anything to be done about it sadly. Our company has a no harassment policy but it's obvious who the except is.
What should I come prepared with to HR? I will have print outs of all the times she harassed me, the times she didn't show up during her scheduled shifts, the images of my work that proves I was present. I want her fired, but I know that won't happen. What stance should I take knowing that I will still have to deal with her in the future? Is there some terms or language I can use to stress the point more with HR?
I have never made a complaint to HR but I have informed them previously about someone in the company harassing me but did not give specifics.
Jobadvisor
This sounds exhausting — being monitored constantly, having your PTO used against you, and getting blamed for her absences is a genuinely bad situation, and it makes sense you're being careful and methodical about it.
A few thoughts on how to walk into that HR meeting:
Organize your evidence by category, not chronologically. HR people are busy and pattern-matching matters more than a wall of screenshots. Build something like:
- Harassment/monitoring messages (dated, with a 1-line note on what happened around each one)
- Attendance discrepancies — her no-shows where she told you she wasn't coming, paired with your proof of presence
- Schedule/PTO changes she made that affected you unfairly (dates, before/after if you have them)
- Task assignment pattern (you doing only cleaning when scheduled under her, despite it not being your role)
A simple timeline document or spreadsheet up top, with the raw evidence as backup, makes it much easier for HR to actually process this instead of skimming.
Use policy language, not personal language. Instead of "she's harassing me because she's related to the boss," frame it in terms HR has to respond to:
- "Hostile work environment" — persistent, targeted, unwelcome conduct
- "Retaliation risk" — if anything gets worse after you file, that's a distinct, more serious issue
- "Conflict of interest" — a family member of leadership having direct control over your schedule/PTO without oversight
- "Disparate treatment" — no other employee is treated this way; ask directly whether the no-harassment policy applies equally regardless of relation to ownership
Say what outcome you want — but pick something achievable. You said you know firing her isn't realistic. Fair. What you can reasonably ask for:
- Removal of her scheduling/PTO authority over you specifically (this is probably your strongest ask — a conflict-of-interest argument is hard to dismiss)
- A neutral third party (not her) handling your schedule going forward
- Documentation of this complaint on record, in writing, with a date
- Confirmation of what retaliation protections apply if things escalate afterward
Protect yourself going forward regardless of outcome:
- Keep saving everything, including anything that happens after you file — retaliation after a complaint is often taken more seriously than the original behavior
- Ask HR to confirm in writing (email follow-up summarizing the meeting) that the complaint was received and what next steps are
- If your gut says HR won't act, it's worth knowing your local labor board or an employment lawyer consult (many offer free initial calls) can tell you if anything here crosses into legally actionable territory, especially if there's any protected-class angle to how you're being treated, or if her interference with your pay/PTO is documentable financial harm
You clearly already have the instincts for this — the organized evidence, the caution about specifics. Going in with a written ask (not just "please fix this") tends to get further than a general complaint.
Medical Leave before Maternity Leave [PA]
Hi there,
I am freaking out and need some reassurance and advice.
I am 31+1 today and in short my mental health has taken a dive off a cliff. Both my OB and Psych want me out starting sooner versus later on Medical Leave with STD because I am having panic attacks near daily. If I take leave I would be doing an IOP program basically until baby is here.
They would then transfer me to medical leave for however baby arrives - baby is transverse now so currently looking like a c-section.
FMLA would start when I go on medical leave, and then OB would write my works disability company (Hartford) for a PWFA extension of leave as medically there would be a 4 week unprotected gap post birth at the longest. I would also request extension via HR at my company once baby is here.
My job provides 12 weeks of paid maternity leave separate from FMLA / medical leave, so all in all I would not be returning to work til late Feb / early March.
I am scared to get the help I need because of potential retaliation from my company. I understand in theory that is illegal but I am just worried and freaking out.
Can someone give me advice on what to do, or share their experience?
Jobadvisor
First — it makes total sense that you're scared, but please don't let that fear stop you from getting the care your OB and psych are telling you that you need. Panic attacks near-daily at 31 weeks pregnant is serious, and you have real legal protections here. Let me lay out what those are so you can feel more grounded going into this.
FMLA covers you the way you're describing. FMLA doesn't just apply to bonding time after birth — it applies to your own serious health condition, which includes pregnancy complications and mental health conditions requiring treatment (like an IOP program). Your OB and psych certifying this is exactly how FMLA leave for a "serious health condition" is supposed to work. It sounds like you already understand the mechanics well — starting FMLA now for the mental health/IOP piece, transitioning into medical leave for delivery, then into your company's 12 weeks of paid maternity leave.
PWFA (Pregnant Workers Fairness Act) is on your side for the gap. The fact that your OB is planning to request an extension through Hartford for the ~4 week unprotected gap post-birth is smart and is literally what PWFA exists for — reasonable accommodations related to pregnancy, childbirth, and related medical conditions, including extended leave when medically necessary. This is a well-worn path, not something unusual you're asking for.
Retaliation is illegal — and it's also usually not subtle when it happens, which cuts both ways: it means if it happens, it's often documentable, but it also means employers who've been through this before (and HR/leave administrators like Hartford deal with this constantly) generally know retaliating opens them up to real liability. Some things that help protect you regardless:
- Get everything in writing where you can — leave requests, extension requests, any conversations with HR about your plan. Follow up verbal conversations with a confirming email ("Just to recap our conversation today...").
- Let your OB and psych's paperwork do the talking. You don't need to over-explain or justify your leave to your employer beyond what the medical certification says — that's what FMLA/STD paperwork is for.
- Document your performance/standing at work now, while things are normal, so there's a clear "before" picture if anything ever felt off after you return.
- If PA has state-specific protections beyond federal ones (worth a quick check, since PA has its own pregnancy accommodation nuances), your HR or a free consult with an employment attorney can confirm exactly how they stack with FMLA/PWFA.
You are doing the responsible thing here, not causing a problem. A body and mind going through panic attacks daily at 31 weeks pregnant, with a transverse baby likely heading to a c-section, is under real strain — getting into IOP now is protecting both you and the baby, not overreacting.
I'll also gently flag: this is a lot to carry alone while pregnant. If the anxiety about work retaliation itself is adding to the panic attacks, it may be worth mentioning that specific worry to your psych too — sometimes naming the exact fear out loud to your care team helps them support you through it, separate from the medical leave logistics.