So tired of "Benifits" laughed at my interviewer today.

Interviewed for a maintenance position at an apartment complex, asked if they provide housing or a rent discount? The interviewer perked up and said not only do we allow you to apply for an apartment with us after 6 months of employment we'll take the rent right out of your paychecks for you what a great benefit. I couldn't help it just busted out laughing and told her that's not a benefit that's just paying you rent.

Jobadvisor

Here's a raw, honest, and direct response you can post or use as inspiration:

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Man, I feel you. That shit is exhausting.

You’re out here grinding, trying to get back on your feet after doing your time, and they act like “we’ll just deduct the rent straight from your paycheck” is some amazing employee perk. No wonder you laughed in her face.

That’s not a benefit. That’s them making sure they get their money first while you’re still barely scraping by. It’s basically company-controlled housing with extra steps. A real benefit would be actual discounted rent, on-site housing at a reduced rate, or help with deposits — not just automatic paycheck garnishment disguised as convenience.

A lot of these “second chance” jobs love talking about how supportive they are, but when you look closer, the “benefits” are often just ways to keep you trapped in the same low-level cycle. They know people with records have limited options, so they dangle stuff like this and expect you to be grateful.

You’re not crazy for calling it out. But yeah… laughing in the interviewer’s face probably killed that opportunity. I get why it happened though — when you’re tired, broke, and fed up, the bullshit tolerance goes to zero.

Practical advice moving forward:

- Save the raw honesty for after you get the offer (or at least after you’re hired). Right now survival has to come before making a point.

- When they bring up “benefits,” ask very specifically: “What’s the actual rent discount or employee rate?” or “Do you offer any reduction below market rate for employees?” Put the burden on them to be clear.

- Keep applying, but also hit the reentry programs hard in NC (NCWorks, local reentry councils, 211). Some of them have direct connections to employers who are actually better about this stuff.

- Temp agencies and labor-heavy jobs (warehousing, landscaping, construction cleanup) sometimes move faster and care less about the polished interview.

You’re allowed to be pissed off at how rigged it feels. Just don’t let the anger make you self-sabotage when you’re this close to getting kicked out. Channel it into cold, calculated persistence.

You still have a couple days — call 211 today if you haven’t. Tell them exactly where you’re at.

How did the interviewer react after you laughed? And what county are you in? Might be able to point you toward more specific leads.

Hang in there. This phase is brutal, but it doesn’t have to be permanent.

Wrong interview location

I had an interview today. Arrived 30 minutes before the scheduled time as I had to drive over an hour to the interview and wanted to ensure I didn’t get caught in traffic.

Interview was at Starbucks for reference. Not FOR Starbucks.

While I’m at the location, I ordered a drink and took notes to calm my nerves. As soon as our scheduled time came up and I didn’t see anyone, I asked the staff if I was at the right location.

Not only was I at the wrong location, but the address I was sent DIDN’T EXIST. I was provided cross streets, but one of the cross streets doesn’t connect to Starbucks (it’s a couple of streets past what I was sent that’s why my GPS sent me to Starbucks be location I was at).

I wasn’t sent an actual address, but cross streets. This was the second location I was sent as they canceled at another coffee shop that wasn’t Starbucks. Also to note, North and South streets matter in this city so the correct location was 15 minutes away.

5 minutes after my set interview time, they updated the location once they realized I wasn’t there. As soon as I arrived, they said the interviewer left and they’d reschedule.

I’m not upset. I’m disappointed and honestly sad. This role heavily relies on driving to specific venues. I was starting to get my spark back as it’s in a field my whole heart and passion is in. I left 90 minutes before just to be there before time and arranged care for my toddler.

I’m lost for words.

I think because of that, I may not get the job.

Jobadvisor

That sounds genuinely exhausting and heartbreaking — you did everything right. You left with plenty of time, arranged childcare, showed up early, and were set up to fail by information that was just... wrong. The address didn't even exist. That's not on you in any way.

The sadness makes complete sense. This wasn't just an interview — it sounds like it represented something bigger, a chance to get back to work you actually care about. Having that yanked away through no fault of your own, after all that effort and hope, is a real loss to grieve even if it's temporary.

As for not getting the job — I wouldn't assume that yet. How you handle this moment actually matters, and you have more agency here than it might feel like right now.

A few honest thoughts:

This situation reflects on them, not you. They sent a nonexistent address, canceled once already, and the interviewer left after five minutes. A reasonable hiring manager will see that clearly.

A well-written follow-up can reframe this entirely. A calm, professional message that briefly acknowledges what happened — without bitterness — and reaffirms your interest and reliability can actually make you more memorable, not less. It shows exactly the kind of composure a driving-heavy role would need.

You haven't been rejected. They offered to reschedule. That's still an open door.

Would you like help writing that follow-up message? Given how much this role means to you, it's worth making it count.

Asked to tip valet when I parked my own car. Is this normal?

** Left a review and gave 2 stars because it’s not fair to have customers subsidize the employment of their vendors and employees**

Pulled into a restaurant with a small lot marked valet. Attendant told me to park it myself and hand over the keys. I parked it myself, then as I walked in he quietly said it’s $5. When I asked if it was mandatory or a tip, he said “just tips.”

I asked what I’d be tipping for since I parked my own car. They just said to go ahead and go inside. Hostess said free parking is “around the corner but you might get towed.” Owner chased me outside and told me to just give the valet a couple bucks on the way out. “It’s only a dollar or two.”

I left instead.

Is this normal? How would you handle it?

Jobadvisor

This situation sounds genuinely frustrating, and your reaction was pretty reasonable. Here's the breakdown:

Is it normal? Partially. A few things were normal, a few weren't:

• Normal: Valet lots that require you to hand over keys even if you physically park yourself — the attendant still monitors, moves cars around as needed, and is responsible for the vehicle the whole time you're inside.
• Not normal: The attendant being unclear about whether it was mandatory or a tip, then just saying "go inside" when pressed. That's evasive and unprofessional.
• Not normal: The hostess giving you a vague warning about free parking to steer you back. That's pressure tactics.
• Borderline: The owner chasing you down and negotiating the amount down to "a dollar or two." That's awkward and undermines whatever legitimacy the arrangement had.

The core issue is that if there's a fee or expected tip for a valet service — even a minimal one — it should be posted clearly before you commit to pulling in. Most reputable places do this. The lack of upfront communication is the actual problem, not the tipping culture itself.

How others might handle it:

• Some people would just pay the $2 to avoid the friction and move on.
• Others, like you, would leave on principle — which is entirely fair, especially since the communication was deliberately murky.
• A middle path: ask upfront before pulling in if there's a fee. If they can't give you a straight answer, don't pull in.

Your 2-star review is legitimate feedback. Businesses deserve to know when their parking setup creates a confusing or coercive experience for customers. That's useful signal, not an overreaction.

Boss insisting I eat lunch with the office, daily.

I have been at my new job for 2 months. I am salaried in a mid-level role. I have 11 coworkers in my building.

For the past 25 years I’ve been working full time, I leave for lunch. I grab food, eat in my car, and unwind for my lunch period.

Today my boss pulls me aside as kindly insists that I not only start bringing my own lunch, but sitting in the break room with her and my other 10 coworkers for lunch….everyday….because “face time is important for socializing”.

At my age, I get it - office politics are important and blah blah blah but I am already working far beyond 40 hours a week for my measly salary and now I have to give up my lunch to fake small talk? I don’t even enjoy small talk with people I actually care about.

Thanks for listening to my temper tantrum. I’m going to do it, but I won’t enjoy it

Jobadvisor

Ha, that's a completely valid temper tantrum. You're not wrong — that is a real loss. Thirty minutes of genuine decompression in a car is worth more to a lot of people than an hour of forced cheerfulness over a sad desk salad.

A few things that might make it suck slightly less:

Give yourself a transition ritual. If you can't decompress during lunch, carve out 10 minutes before or after — a short walk, sitting in your car before you go in, whatever. The car lunch worked because of the alone time, not the car specifically.

Pick a seat with an exit strategy. Sit somewhere you can reasonably leave after 20 minutes with "back to it!" energy without it being weird.

Let yourself be a quiet participant. "Face time" doesn't mean performance. Eating, half-listening, occasionally nodding — that counts. You don't have to carry the conversation.

Notice if it actually costs you. Two months in, you're still new. There's a decent chance the boss is right that visibility matters right now, even if the mandate is annoying. It might be worth less psychic energy to just do it for six months and reassess than to resent it daily.

The one thing worth holding onto: you're still salaried, still working beyond 40 hours, and now your lunch break is a work activity. That's a real thing. You're not being dramatic about it.

Hope the small talk is at least occasionally tolerable. 🫡

My manager constantly lies about me to protect herself 

looking for some advice on how best to handle this situation…

the hierachy is regional manager, MY manager & then me.

The regional manager will always ask my manager to tell me to complete tasks, projects etc. My manager has terrible management skills & is so overwhelmed and stressed in her own job, so she forgets to tell me about it.

I’m assuming what is happening is that the regional manager is asking my manager “why has (me) not completed that task we asked her to do?” and then my manager is claiming that she DID tell me to complete it and I haven’t. I’m assuming she gets nervous that she will be in trouble for not relaying information.

Theres been a couple of occasions now where I’ve been tagged into emails asking why haven’t I done something I was asked to do, or in my yearly review I’m marked as “not meeting expectations” for projects and goals I was never actually assigned. I defend myself and say this is the first I’m hearing of it, but my manager and the regional manager are extremely close, so she believes my manager when she says that she did assign me the tasks.

My manager claims I’m using “you never told me to do that” as a defense for my poor work performance. I’ve asked if she can start putting tasks and assignments in writing but I’ve been told this isn’t an effective use of time.

Unsure what to do here?

Jobadvisor

This is a really frustrating situation, and unfortunately it's more common than it should be. Here's how I'd approach it:

Start creating your own paper trail — quietly

Since they won't put things in writing, you need to do it yourself. After any verbal conversation where you're assigned a task, send a follow-up email that same day: "Just to confirm from our conversation today, I'll be working on X with a deadline of Y." This creates a record without being confrontational. If there was no conversation, there's no email — and that absence is your evidence.

Document everything retroactively from now on

Keep a private log (personal email or personal device, NOT work systems) with dates, what was discussed, what wasn't, and any witnesses. If you're ever in a meeting where tasks are assigned, write down notes right after and email them to yourself. Timestamps matter.

Stop defending and start redirecting

Instead of saying "you never told me," which sounds like an excuse even when it's true, try: "I don't have a record of that task — can you help me understand where the communication broke down so we can avoid this in the future?" It sounds collaborative but still makes clear you weren't informed.

Go over her head carefully

Since the regional manager is close with your manager, a direct complaint will likely backfire. Instead, find natural opportunities to build a direct relationship with the regional manager — respond promptly, do excellent work on visible tasks, and let your reliability speak for itself over time.

Request a process change framed as efficiency

Rather than "I need things in writing because my manager lies," try raising it as a team efficiency issue: "I want to make sure I'm never missing a priority — could we try a weekly email summary of open tasks? I think it would help the whole team stay aligned." This is harder to refuse and doesn't single anyone out.

Consider HR

If this continues to affect your performance reviews formally, that's a documented employment record issue — which is exactly what HR exists for. A performance review marking you as "not meeting expectations" for tasks you were never assigned is something worth flagging, especially once you have your own paper trail.

The goal right now is to make it structurally impossible for tasks to be "assigned" without your knowledge, without accusing anyone directly.

Safety Concerns

A man at work was moved locations due to harassing all the women and was talked to about showing his conceal and carry gun onsite.

My company allows employees to conceal and carry but be smart about it, don't show it off, put it away, etc.

This loser has been harassing women, not performing his job, had many complaints and the company absolutely refuses to fire him.

I was gone yesterday but someone had told me they saw him loading his gun at his desk, while employees and customers were walking by. He had taken the magazine out, filled it, then reloaded it.

I said they need to send the complaint directly to HR since their supervisor never takes care of these things and he'd already been warned about this.

They won't file a complaint because nothing ever happens to this guy. But I'm tempted to file one myself but be honest about not witnessing it and the person who did is scared to say something.

How should I approach this? This idiot sits near me and I'm not about to deal with this if it happens again. He's clearly not apprehensive about having the gun out and loaded.

Jobadvisor

This is a genuinely serious situation, and your instinct to act is right. Here's how I'd approach it:

File the complaint yourself, even as a secondhand report. HR and safety complaints don't require you to be a direct witness. You can frame it honestly: "I was not present, but a colleague who witnessed this reported it to me and is afraid to come forward." That's a legitimate and useful report. You're not lying or exaggerating.

Frame it as a safety issue, not just a conduct issue. Loading a firearm at a desk in a customer-facing environment is a different category of concern than harassment or poor performance. Use that language explicitly — "workplace safety risk," "potential liability," "creating fear among staff and customers." Companies respond differently when legal exposure is on the table.

Go above your HR contact if needed. If HR has consistently ignored complaints about this person, escalate to HR leadership, a compliance officer, or legal/risk management. If your company is large enough, there may be an ethics hotline or anonymous reporting system.

Document everything in writing. Send your complaint by email so there's a paper trail with timestamps. Note the pattern — prior warnings about displaying the weapon, harassment complaints, the move to a new location — all of it in one place.

Know your external options. If internal reporting continues to go nowhere, OSHA covers workplace safety threats, and the General Duty Clause requires employers to protect workers from recognized hazards. A complaint to OSHA is something companies take very seriously. Depending on your state, there may also be labor board or law enforcement avenues if the behavior constitutes a credible threat.

The colleague who witnessed it is understandably scared, but you filing a good-faith secondhand report protects you both and creates a record. If something does happen, you want it documented that you raised the alarm.