Husband in trouble for discussing pay
My husband was recently told (today) he may face consequences for discussing his pay, and I’m trying to understand if this is allowed.
He’s been with his company for 3 years and has earned multiple certifications and raises over time. Last week he moved into a new position (same pay, just a different pay category/department structure).
In his role, employees are ranked Levels 1–3 (3 is the lowest). He and a coworker are both Level 3 (same position and level). They were talking about overtime, and my husband mentioned that with overtime he’ll likely be close to six figures this year. The coworker was surprised, so my husband shared his hourly rate. It turns out the coworker makes about only $1 more per hour, even though he’s been in that position for around 4 years.
The coworker reported it to management. The supervisor and director then pulled my husband aside and told him:
• He should not be discussing pay
• Pay/raises are confidential
• There will likely be consequences since the coworker is making a big deal…He only shared his own pay and is not management or HR.
Can a company in Georgia discipline an employee for discussing their own wages? And if they do, what options would he have?
Just trying to understand his rights and how concerned we should be.
Also to note if it even matters he’s never been written up or had any issues.
Jobadvisor
This is a situation where your husband's supervisors are likely the ones who are actually in "trouble"—legally speaking.
While Georgia is an "at-will" state (meaning employers can generally fire someone for no reason), federal law creates a major exception for this exact scenario.
The Law: National Labor Relations Act (NLRA)
Under Section 7 of the NLRA, almost all private-sector employees (regardless of whether they are in a union) have the right to engage in "protected concerted activity." The National Labor Relations Board (NLRB) has long held that discussing wages with coworkers for the purpose of mutual aid or protection is a core protected right.
It is illegal for an employer to have a policy that forbids employees from discussing their own pay.
It is illegal to discipline, threaten, or fire an employee for sharing their hourly rate or salary with a coworker.
It is illegal to tell an employee that their pay is "confidential."
Where the Lines Are Drawn
The law protects your husband because:
He shared his own pay: He didn't hack into a database or leak payroll files he had access to as part of his job duties (HR/Managers are often excluded from these protections for that reason).
It was a peer-to-peer conversation: Discussing wages with a coworker to compare "market value" or fairness is the textbook definition of protected activity.
What Options Does He Have?
If the company follows through with "consequences" (a write-up, demotion, or firing), he has several avenues:
File a Charge with the NLRB: This is the primary federal agency that handles these violations. He does not need a lawyer to do this, and the process is free. If the NLRB finds the company violated his rights, they can force the company to rescind the discipline, pay back-wages, and post a notice to all employees stating they have the right to discuss pay.
Documentation: He should immediately write down exactly what was said in the meeting with the supervisor and director. He should include dates, times, and specific quotes (e.g., "We were told pay is confidential and there will be consequences").
HR Dialogue: If he feels comfortable, he can gently point out that federal law (the NLRA) protects his right to discuss his wages. Sometimes managers are simply uneducated on labor laws and back down once they realize they are inviting a federal investigation.
How Concerned Should You Be?
Since he has a clean record and 3 years of tenure, a sudden "consequence" for a legally protected activity would be a very "loud" red flag for any labor investigator. Most companies back off once their legal department or HR realizes the supervisors have made an illegal threat.
Should I file an HR complaint about a coworker who lied and caused me to lose hours? [NV]
I’m a newer employee and recently had a situation that’s been bothering me more the longer I think about it.
One of my coworkers was covering for someone else and was scheduled to come in at 10am. Instead, she showed up at my scheduled time (8am) and told me she couldn’t work her assigned departments because she “didn’t have access” and her login needed to be reset.
It sounded strange, but I didn’t want to cause conflict, so I switched my schedule and ended up losing two hours. Later, I emailed my manager to express how upset I was about the situation — and that’s when I found out she had lied. She did have access. There was no login issue. She just didn’t want to work her assigned departments.
I emailed my manager a week ago and still haven’t gotten a response.
At this point, it’s not even about the hours. It’s the principle. I don’t like being lied to or taken advantage of, and I don’t want this to become a pattern.
Would you file a complaint with HR in this situation?
Jobadvisor
This is a frustrating introduction to a new workplace. Being manipulated into losing pay because a coworker wanted to cherry-pick their tasks is a legitimate grievance.
In Nevada, as in most states, HR isn't there to be a "referee" for every personality clash, but they are there to handle issues involving payroll, scheduling integrity, and dishonest conduct.
Here is a breakdown of how to handle this, keeping in mind that your manager has already ghosted your first email.
1. The "Manager First" Rule
Since you already emailed your manager and haven't heard back, you have two possibilities:
The manager is busy and missed it.
The manager saw it and thinks it’s a "minor" dispute they don't want to deal with.
Before going to HR: Send a "gentle nudge" follow-up to your manager. This shows you followed the chain of command.
"Hi [Manager Name], I’m following up on my email from last week regarding the schedule swap on [Date]. Since learning that the login issue wasn't accurate, I'm concerned about the impact on my scheduled hours. I’d love to discuss how we can prevent this from happening again."
2. When to Go to HR
If your manager continues to ignore you, or if they dismiss it as "no big deal," moving to HR is reasonable for three specific reasons:
Time Theft/Wage Loss: You were scheduled for hours that were essentially "stolen" through deception. HR cares about the integrity of the time-clock.
Company Policy: Most companies have a "Code of Conduct" that explicitly prohibits lying to coworkers to manipulate schedules.
Establishing a Paper Trail: If this coworker is comfortable lying to a new employee now, they will likely do it again. A formal record prevents them from claiming "this is the first time" later on.
3. How to Frame the HR Complaint
If you decide to file, do not focus on your feelings or "the principle." Focus on the business impact. HR responds to facts, not hurt feelings.
Use this framework:
The Fact: "On [Date], Coworker X arrived at 8 am and stated they could not work their shift due to a login failure."
The Action: "Relying on that information, I conceded my 8 am start time to them, resulting in a loss of 2 hours of pay."
The Discovery: "Management later confirmed there was no login issue."
The Request: "I am reporting this to ensure schedule integrity and to request that my lost hours be addressed."
The Verdict
Should you file? If the follow-up to your manager goes unanswered for another 48 hours, yes.
However, be aware that as a "newer employee," you are still in the "impression-building" phase. Filing a formal complaint can sometimes label you as "difficult" in toxic workplaces—even when you are 100% in the right. If the workplace culture seems healthy otherwise, a firm conversation with the manager is usually the better first strike.
Woman I went on TWO dates with has been Non stop harassing and threatening me after rejection [NY]
Location: [NY]
Hey, met this girl on hinge. She works at my job
I noticed she just non stop texts me
first date she told me she has a restraining order against her ex
should’ve ran right there
second date she asks me to come over to my apt w a bottle of wine
she comes over I get really drunk but I can’t get aroused as i’m not attracted to her. She stormed out
she texts me got home safely goodnight (doesn’t add up w her later story(
follows up with “what I did that night”
says I “held her face aggressively” and said “i’d beat her up a little” and was “sniffing something “
I say I don’t recall any of it but i’m sorry
I figure ok it was a bad exp let’s go our separate ways
fast forward she starts texting me a lot again multiple times no reply from me
When I say multiple I mean like four five times and paragraphs
first day of work after new years I see her in the kitchen on my floor. I avoid her go to my desk.
She sends me four five texts in a row asking me why i’m avoiding her
Eventually I get back on her good side by just replying a few times but days later again she is non stop texting me and when I don’t reply, I’m a “manipulating liar” again.
This culminates in me blocking her saying listen You constantly attacking me is very draining we should go separate ways.
I block her. She messages me on MS TEAMS saying she is anxious and sneers to talk. She writes essay from second phone number saying she’s anxious and needs to talk to me and she’s crying and shaken up and that she can’t leave things on bad terms w me.
I say there’s no hard feelings it not personal. She won’t take no for an answer. Threatens me that she’ll. “talk to someone at work” about me bc she has too much anxiety
She deletes messages on MS teams to get access to me but I took. a picture
I unblock her and she starts writing me essays again. Goes on for weeks. Most times I don’t reply
She texts me pressing me that I better be at work next day. or she’ll “take my sweater from my chair” I ask her how she knows where I sit (we are on two diff floors and diff depts)
she’s asking me pretty pls and that she hasn’t seen me in weeks (clearly i’m on her good side)
Eventually she pressures me to go to lunch at work. I go and tell her I can’t do this.
Her whole mood flips.
goes home that night and texts me that she is gonna talk to someone at work. Then next day that she knows everything ab my ex and that i’m sick.
Then she claims im a cocaine dealer and that I see a lot of other girls.
Then she says she’s gonna have me back in jail.
I block this number.
She texts me from diff numbers threatening to press charges.
At this point I go to the cops and make. a harassment report and show them all the screenshots. I have nothing to hide.
She texts me from a third number saying she’s sorry for what’s ab to happen to me
Few days later she posts ab me on facebook. My home girl saw and reported it.
She posted me on the tea app with all these allegations and “other victims “
Then she reached out to my DAD. Texted my dad with all these allegations acting like she has my best interest. My parents are in their 60s and immigrants
Then she messages me on Teams AGAIN saying either I “catch up with her” or she will tell my mom everything.
I don’t reply. She deleted the messages
Then last night she posted about me on instagram. Put me on blast to all her followers saying i’m an assaulter and I “suffocated her” (she never said this before and made so many attempts to talk to me and be close to me) and that I have a camera in my room and that I sell drugs.
She has also made anonymous posts about me on fb with some
wild allegations basically trying to ruin my life in all facets.
Please HR, I don’t know what to do in this situation? Should I talk to her? Should I get a restraining order? I’ve been silent for weeks and it’s just getting worse and worse
At this point after I block her she has made almost six diff new phone numbers to threaten and harass me and my elderly parents. She is cold calling people on ig to get dirt on me. She is posting about me. She has aired me out on IG as if I am an abuser here and that I suffocated her and threatened to beat her up
Also get my bonus in two weeks don’t want to jeopardize. Also worried if HR will look into my attendance and notice I often wfh or I come in late (my manager is cool w this but did tell me before that HR may not be)
Jobadvisor
This is a volatile situation that has moved far beyond a "bad breakup." You are being subjected to criminal harassment, stalking, and defamation.
Because she is a coworker and is using company tools (MS Teams) to threaten you, this is now a workplace safety issue. Here is how you need to handle this immediately, specifically regarding HR and the legal side in NY.
1. Do NOT Talk to Her
Any response you give—even if it's "please stop"—is viewed by people with this personality profile as a "win" because they got your attention. Maintain total radio silence. Do not defend yourself to her, do not apologize, and do not try to "calm her down." It will be used against you.
2. The "HR vs. Bonus" Dilemma
You mentioned being worried about your bonus and your attendance (WFH/coming in late).
The Attendance: If your manager is cool with your schedule, HR typically won't go digging into your badge swipes unless they are looking for a reason to fire you.
The Reality: She has already threatened to "talk to someone at work." In cases like this, the person who reports first usually has the advantage. If she goes to HR first and claims you assaulted/suffocated her, you will be on the defensive. If you go first, you are a victim of harassment reporting a credible threat to your safety and the company's reputation.
3. Immediate Actions with HR
Go to HR and frame this as a Workplace Safety and Harassment issue.
MS Teams Evidence: Show them the photos of the MS Teams messages she sent and then deleted. This is "misuse of company equipment" and is a fireable offense in many NY companies.
The "Lies" Defense: Point out the inconsistency in her story. She claimed you "suffocated" her, yet she spent weeks begging to see you, asking for lunch, and stalking your desk location. Victims of suffocation do not typically beg their "abuser" for lunch dates.
The Drugs/Camera Allegations: Tell HR plainly: "She is making wild, defamatory claims because I rejected her. I have already filed a police report for harassment."
4. Legal Steps in New York
Since you already have a police report, you need to escalate:
Order of Protection (Restraining Order): In NY, you can seek a Family Court or Criminal Court order of protection. Given the threats to your parents and the constant new phone numbers, a judge will see this as "Aggravated Harassment."
Cease and Desist: Have a lawyer send a formal Cease and Desist letter regarding the defamation (the "Tea" app and Facebook posts). Even if she doesn't stop, it creates a paper trail that you are fighting these lies.
Social Media: Report the posts as "Harassment" or "Non-consensual sexual content/Violence" to the platforms.
5. Protecting Your Parents
Since she is contacting your immigrant parents, they should block any unknown numbers immediately. If she continues to call them, that is a separate count of harassment you should add to your police file.
Summary of your "Defense Package"
When you talk to HR or the Police, have a folder (digital and physical) ready with:
The Timeline: A simple list of dates: "Date X: Met. Date Y: She threatened Z. Date Z: She contacted my father."
The "Reaching Out" Evidence: Screenshots of her begging to see you after the alleged incident. This destroys her credibility regarding the assault claims.
The MS Teams photos.
The Police Report Number.