I'm in my 30s and I'm done with this nonsense.. Anyone else doesnt know what to do?
As the title says, I’m done with this crap. I’m in my 30s and I still don’t know what I want to do when I “grow up.”
I’ve basically gone from one extreme to another. I used to be a total workaholic... working on holidays, doing unpaid overtime, constantly checking emails.. to now not caring about work at all.
Right now I’ve got a job that pays well, definitely above average for my age. Honestly, I don’t even know how I landed it. Probably just because I know how to sell myself in interviews. The job’s decent, the people are nice, and the salary is good… but I don’t actually want to do it. I don’t even have a solid reason. I just don’t want to work anymore.
I’ve been working since I was 16 and I think I’ve hit a wall. The more I see, the more I realize nobody really knows what the hell they’re doing. In my current role I work directly with CEOs, founders, and directors of global companies (even big, well-known ones), and it’s chaos everywhere. Same problems in every company: zero communication, stingy leadership, no proper training, poor organisation, terrible time management, office politics, and people who can’t do the basics. It blows my mind that people at the very top can’t even interpret a simple dashboard I learned to read back in high school. And the worst part? Everyone acts like all this nonsense is super important. They’re so driven to deliver “the big project,” and then three months later the company goes bust anyway.
So yeah, I’ve lost all motivation. At this point, call me anything but ambitious. I keep wondering if it’d be better to just have a simple job and live a quiet life in the forest instead of grinding away in a massive city. I’m seriously considering quitting my well-paid, secure job for something completely different. Maybe I’ll become a gardener, cut some bushes, and stop pretending to care about “that project,” “this proposal,” or “what Janet from finance thinks.”
Am I losing it? Or does anyone else feel the same way?
Jobadvisor
I hear you, and I can tell you're going through a lot of frustration and a real crisis of meaning. First, let me say this: No, you are absolutely not losing it.
What you're describing is incredibly common, especially for people in their 30s who have spent a decade or more climbing a ladder only to realize they don't like the view from the top. Many people experience this kind of burnout and disillusionment—a feeling that the "game" everyone is playing is meaningless, disorganized, and not worth their time or effort.
The fact that you've gone from being a total workaholic to feeling completely unmotivated suggests you've hit a wall. You've experienced both extremes, and now you're seeking a middle ground—a life that feels authentic and worthwhile.
The Core of the Disillusionment
It's actually very insightful that your lack of motivation stems from seeing the inner workings of successful companies.
The "Chaos at the Top": Your observation that CEOs and directors are often disorganized, poor communicators, and sometimes incompetent is a huge wake-up call for many people. It shatters the myth that "success" equals competence or that the most powerful people have all the answers. When you see that it's all just chaos and people pretending to know what they're doing, the incentive to join that fray disappears.
The Theatre of Work: You've correctly identified that a lot of corporate life is performance—caring about "the big project" that will be forgotten in three months, the endless politics, and treating small things as if they are life-or-death. This realization is a major step toward recognizing that your energy is better spent on things that bring you genuine value, not things that society tells you should matter.
You're Not Alone—It's a Common Pivot Point
The feeling of wanting to quit a secure, high-paying job for something simpler—like gardening or moving to the forest—is a classic sign of this pivot point. It's often referred to as a "mid-career crisis" or a "crisis of meaning."
You're not rejecting work entirely; you're rejecting the system you're currently in. You're rejecting the anxiety, the pretense, and the misalignment with your own values.
This is a time for a re-evaluation, not necessarily a full, immediate rejection of everything.
What to Do Next
Before you hand in your resignation and buy a rusty pair of hedge clippers (though that is a lovely image!), here are a few things you can do to explore this feeling:
1. Identify Your Non-Negotiables (What You're Running Toward)
Your current motivation is to run away from your job. That's a powerful force, but it can lead to another dead end. You need to figure out what you want to run toward.
What is the opposite of your current misery? If your job is stress, chaos, and pretense, maybe you crave calmness, tangible results, and authenticity.
What did you like about your former "workaholic" self? Perhaps it was the feeling of mastery, or the satisfaction of solving a complex problem? You can find those things in a non-corporate environment.
The Forest Life: Don't just fantasize about the forest; define the qualities of that life you crave. Is it working with your hands, being outdoors, a slower pace, or autonomy?
2. De-Risk the Escape
You have a high-paying, secure job—use it to your advantage for now.
Buy Back Your Time: A well-paid job offers something crucial: the ability to build a financial cushion. If you haven't already, focus for a short time on maximizing your savings. This Financial Independence (FI) cushion can give you the freedom to quit without immediate panic.
Test the Waters: Use your weekends and vacation time to seriously explore your alternative life.
Volunteer at a local farm or nursery. Spend a full day doing manual labor to see if you genuinely love the gardening work, or if it's just a romantic ideal.
Take a carpentry, pottery, or other trade class. Test your interest in creating tangible things.
Take a long trip to a smaller town or rural area. Can you handle the isolation and lack of big-city infrastructure?
3. Re-Negotiate Your Current Role
Since you don't care about the job, let go of the pressure to be a superstar.
"Quiet Quitting" as a Strategic Move: Since you have job security and a great salary, you can afford to do the bare minimum required to keep the job.
Stop checking emails after hours.
Stop taking on extra projects.
Use the extra mental and physical energy you free up to pursue the new path you've identified in step 1.
You're in a common and understandable place. This feeling of "being done" is a compass, telling you it's time to chart a completely new course based on what you value, not what the corporate world tells you to value.
What is one small, low-risk thing you can do this week to test out the gardening/quiet-life idea?
Destined to only like “useless” degrees
I went to school and got a bachelor’s in a STEM (natural sciences) field because it was what was expected of me, but I have zero interest in STEM and haven’t used my degree since I got it.
I’m being pushed into going to grad school, but I don’t know what I want to study. I don’t like technology and I’m not interested in the healthcare industry. Trade school is not an option either, nor is the military. I’m taking a few data analysis/business computing classes right now and I hate them. I can’t imagine myself doing this as a career.
My love has always in the humanities and what they call “useless degrees”, and I feel alone in this. I’ve been searching for posts of people in my same predicament and 9/10 times those who are as lost as I am have some interest in IT, CS or some other “good” field that would benefit them to get involved in. It sucks being someone who is destined to only like subjects that are known for making no money or having no available jobs. But even then, I don’t know what I’d do. I like writing as a hobby, but I don’t want to be a professional writer. I like art but I’m not good at it. I like languages and culture but I don’t know what you can even do with that other than teach or be some government ambassador.
I’m just ranting more than anything else. It doesn’t help that my interests are never steady enough to pinpoint what I actually want to do. I like a lot of little things, but I can be devoted to something one day and be bored with it the next. A real Jack of all trades, master at none. It sucks and I feel like a complete waste.
Jobadvisor
I hear you, and it sounds like you're in a really tough spot. Please know that what you're feeling—this mix of pressure, indecision, and the fear of making the "wrong" choice—is incredibly common, even if the specifics of your situation feel unique. It's completely understandable to feel like a "waste" when your genuine interests don't align with the career paths that society (or family) pushes as the most valuable or lucrative.
First, let's address the idea of "useless degrees" and your interests.
Redefining "Useless"
The notion that humanities degrees are "useless" is a harmful myth, especially in a world where AI is rapidly changing the job landscape. Many of the most successful people across different industries—from tech CEOs to business leaders—have backgrounds in the humanities. Here's why:
Humanities skills are future-proof skills. Degrees in fields like history, literature, philosophy, or languages teach you to think critically, analyze complex information, communicate clearly and persuasively, and understand diverse perspectives. These are the very soft skills that companies value most, especially as technical work becomes more automated.
STEM doesn't guarantee happiness or success. You already have a STEM degree and know firsthand that it doesn't automatically translate to a satisfying career. Happiness and engagement in your work often lead to success more reliably than a "safe" degree.
Your skills are transferable. You have a STEM background, which demonstrates discipline, analytical reasoning, and the ability to learn complex subjects. Pairing that analytical foundation with a passion for the humanities can make you an incredibly strong and unique job candidate.
Exploring Career Paths for Your Interests
You mentioned loving languages, culture, and writing (even as a hobby). You also said you're a Jack of all trades, master of none, with interests that tend to shift. That's not a weakness; it's a profile that often thrives in hybrid or communication-intensive roles that require adaptability.
Instead of thinking about a degree leading to a single job title, think about the skills you enjoy using:
| If you like... | Consider these skills/roles... | Potential Career Fields (Requiring a Hybrid Skillset) |
| Languages & Culture | Interpreting, Research, Cross-Cultural Communication, Analysis | International Business/Marketing: Bridging communication between global teams. |
| Writing & Analysis | Synthesizing Information, Persuasion, Content Creation, Editing | Technical Writing/Editing: Even in tech or business, someone needs to make complex ideas clear. (You have the STEM background for this!) |
| Adaptability & Shift in Focus | Project Management, Problem Solving, Learning New Topics Quickly | Project Management (in any sector): Constantly moving between different tasks and topics. Consulting: Solving a variety of problems for different clients. |
Specific ideas that leverage humanities skills without being "professional writer" or "teacher":
Content Strategy/Marketing: Writing for a business or organization. This involves research, understanding an audience (culture), and strategic communication.
User Experience (UX) Writing/Research: Designing the language people see in apps and websites. This uses logic, clarity (writing), and an understanding of human behavior (psychology/culture).
Archival/Museum Studies: Directly engaging with history, culture, and organization (research).
Librarian Science (MLIS): Not just organizing books—it's about information management, research, and community engagement.
What to Do Next
You are not alone, and you are not a waste. You are a highly analytical person who has already proven you can do the "hard" work, and now you have the opportunity to make a pivot toward something that actually excites you.
STOP the Grad School Pressure (For Now): Do not commit to a grad program because you feel pushed or because you "should." Grad school is too expensive and demanding to do without a clear passion. Press pause on that decision.
Look for "Gateway" Jobs: Start applying for entry-level roles that sit at the intersection of your two worlds. Look for titles like Editorial Assistant, Communications Coordinator, Research Assistant, or even entry-level Project Coordinator. These jobs often require general communication skills and show you different corporate environments before committing to more schooling.
Find Your "Why" for Grad School: If you do decide on grad school, it should be because a specific program is required for a specific job you're excited about. For example, a Master's in Public Policy, Library Science, or Communications is highly respected and could leverage your analytical and writing skills.
You've got a great foundation. Now it's time to build a path that makes you excited to get up in the morning, even if it feels less conventional!
Does any of this resonate with what you've been thinking, or do any of those hybrid job titles sound like they might be worth looking into?