My company had a huge kick-off event two Thursdays ago, with tons of professional speakers and of course, an open bar at the end.
What I did was stupid at the event, and would be grounds for termination if there was any proof.
This past Friday I was called into HR to speak and was told that multiple reports came in of this event occurring, which I denied. My division president was in this meeting too.
I was not fired, but was told this would be a great learning lesson for me, and that my division president reassured me that there will be many new opportunities to pursue headed my way - which is true. HR and my division president said that once I leave the room, it is completely done for me and both of them, and was to never be spoken about again. I was never written up.
I am feeling so embarrassed and ashamed of this (rightfully so) and that I have permanently tarnished my reputation with this company. Every day I feel like I am iced out, and people don’t want to even look me in my eyes. I feel like I can’t ever recover from this, and the anxiety I feel every day leads me to feel like I should put in my resignation.
I’m just left feeling like they wanted me to confess to having grounds to fire me, or now they are just waiting for me to officially resign. I have no clue what to do, and can’t believe I messed up like this…
JA:
Everyone makes mistakes and this is a great learning experience. I sincerely hope you learn the lesson to NOT bring your own to an open bar and to also watch how much you drink. Just because it had an open bar, it was still a work event and a certain level of decorum is expected. But will this hang over your head forever? No, not in a million years. It'll take a few months but eventually, it'll be forgotten by everyone except you (who doesn't obsessively remember times that make you embarrass yourself?). I suggest reframing from drinking at all at the next event and then limit yourself or pace yourself in the future