25m with $100k saved at dead end job, how do I begin to start building an actual career?

I’ve worked very hard in the moving industry making $21hr plus tips for a few years and have managed to save 100k but I’m capped out at the money I’m making, also it’s back breaking work and I’m over it. I’m burnt out and I can’t do this forever. I also want a higher paying job so I know I’ll have to probably go to college and get a degree but I have no idea what to do or where to start. I have 0 direction so far in what I want to do as a “career” any advice on what I should do to find a career and start working towards it now? Ideally I don’t want to travel so probably nothing to do with the military.

Jobadvisor

That's actually a really strong position to be starting from — $100k saved at 25 with solid work ethic is more than most people have. The hard part was already done. Now it's about direction.

Here's how I'd think about this:

Step 1: Figure out what kind of work fits you — before committing to anything expensive

Before spending money on school, spend a few weeks asking yourself honest questions:

• Do you like working with people, data, things, or ideas?
• Do you want to be mostly physical, mostly mental, or a mix?
• Do you care more about high income, stability, creativity, or helping others?
• Do you want to be indoors/outdoors, in an office, on a job site, etc.?

You've done physical, people-facing work for years. Think about what parts of the moving job you actually didn't mind, and what you genuinely hated. That's real data about yourself.

Step 2: Consider paths that don't require a 4-year degree

College isn't always the answer — especially not right away. With $100k you have runway, but you don't want to burn it on tuition for a degree in the wrong field. Some high-earning paths with shorter timelines:

• Trades with advancement — Electrician, plumber, HVAC technician. You already have trade experience. Apprenticeships pay while you learn, and licensed tradespeople can earn $80–120k+. You could even eventually run your own crew.
• Tech — Coding bootcamps (6 months, ~$15k) or self-taught paths into software development, IT, or cybersecurity. Not easy, but high ceiling. Lots of remote work too.
• Real estate — Your savings could also serve as a down payment eventually. Getting a license is cheap and fast (~$1–2k, a few months). Not a guaranteed path but worth knowing about.
• Healthcare — Radiology tech, respiratory therapy, dental hygienist — 2-year programs, strong job security, $60–90k range.
• Business/sales — Your people skills from moving work are genuinely valuable. Sales roles at tech companies can pay $70–100k with no degree.

Step 3: If college does make sense, be strategic about it

If you go the degree route, community college for the first 2 years is the smart play — same credits, a fraction of the cost. Only transfer to a 4-year school if it makes financial sense. Avoid taking on debt for a degree without a clear job market attached to it.

Step 4: Use your savings wisely — don't touch it yet

$100k is an emergency fund, an education fund, and potentially a business fund. Don't blow it on tuition until you know what direction you're going. Keep it in a high-yield savings account (currently ~4–5% APY) while you figure things out. That money should be working for you even while you decide.

The most practical next move right now:

Take 2–4 weeks and do some actual research — not just browsing, but talking to people in fields that interest you. Look up job postings on LinkedIn and Indeed for roles that seem appealing and see what they actually require. You might find that what you thought required a 4-year degree really just requires a certification or 2-year program.

You're not behind. You're actually ahead. Most people at 25 don't have $100k and a clear reason to change — you have both.

Should I decline an internal promotion over my new manager's behaviour during negotiations?

I was offered an internal promotion two weeks ago at a ~20% pay bump. The posted salary was slightly higher, but they said that was a mistake in the posting and it was supposed to say "up to X" rather than "X exactly." I verbally accepted the job despite this. The contract was meant to be sent the next day — it never arrived. They assumed I'd signed.

Two days later I had been told a discussion about carry-over would take place, and in my mind I wanted that conversation before signing, so I didn't chase the contract. Since then, people have been congratulating me, and I'd been telling them I hadn't finalised the role yet but appreciated it.

Two weeks later, after a discussion with the new team lead and my current lead, I found out they wanted me to carry over the most specialised part of my current role. It takes about 25% of my time each month and requires a skillset that would cost roughly my current salary to bring in and train someone new to do. Personally, I felt that if I'd already signed the contract, they would have simply expected me to carry it over and I'd have been trapped.

I said this was outside the scope of the new role, but that I'd be comfortable carrying it over if I was remunerated for it — I can see how it benefits the business by avoiding a full-time hire and representing a significant cost saving. But if we can make it work for both parties, either temporarily while they found a replacement or long-term if I was going to keep the responsibilities. They seemed visibly shocked. They asked me to provide a breakdown of the work and the time it takes, which I did, landing at 25%. My current manager actually handled herself fairly well and said they would go and look at it.

The day after this conversation, in a business-wide meeting, the new manager looked particularly angry whenever I was around. She didn't say anything, but it was noticeable. I ignored it. The following day, I wanted to make sure she understood I still wanted the role, so I asked for a Teams call to try to break the ice — negotiations can be stressful, and I didn't want things to sour. I told her I still really wanted the role, but that carrying over the specialist work was out of scope. She was visibly displeased, short, and defensive as I explained, taking it all very personally.

Given how badly the new manager has reacted over these two days, I'm almost inclined not to take the role. I don't really need the money, and my current position is secure. The new title is much better industry-wide and the money would be nice — but I can't help feeling that if the manager is like this now, what will it be like over the next 12–18 months? They are likely to review tomorrow but I might just decline the role before they return with an offer.

I don't know whether to take the role or not. I feel like I should decline, mainly because the new manager is already raising red flags before I've even started. Worth noting: the previous person in this role left because they didn't want to be managed by this person. The previous hire was there for 10 years but remained very professional and didn't disclose much information about it.

Would you take the role or not? Also how would you decline it if you did? Need advice!

Jobadvisor

This is a genuinely tricky situation, and I think your instincts are worth taking seriously. Let me give you my honest read.

The negotiation itself was reasonable. You didn't do anything wrong. You caught what would have been a significant scope creep issue before signing — likely by design, whether intentional or not. Asking to be remunerated for work that costs roughly your current salary to replace externally is completely rational. The fact that they were shocked by that conversation is itself telling — it suggests they expected you to absorb it quietly.

The manager's behaviour is the real issue. The negotiation discomfort is understandable — nobody loves being pushed back on. But visibly sulking in a business-wide meeting the next day, and then being short and defensive when you reached out specifically to smooth things over? That's a maturity problem. You handled that follow-up call with more professionalism than most people would, and she still couldn't meet you halfway. That's not negotiation stress — that's how she operates.

The fact that your predecessor of 10 years left specifically because of her, and stayed tight-lipped about it, is probably the most important data point in your whole situation. That's not a coincidence. That's a pattern.

My honest view: I wouldn't take the role, and I don't think it's even close. Here's why:

• You don't need the money
• Your current position is secure
• You've already seen how she handles conflict, and it's poorly
• A better title won't feel good if the working relationship is miserable
• 12–18 months under a manager who takes professional negotiations personally is a long time

The only thing the role offers is title and salary. Those are real — but they're available elsewhere, without this baggage.

If you decide to decline, keep it warm, brief, and entirely about the role rather than the manager. Something like this:

---A few notes on the wording: "right fit for me right now" is deliberately vague — it's honest without being inflammatory. Offering to help with the specialist work handover is a gracious touch that keeps relationships intact. You want to leave this looking like your decision about fit, not a referendum on the manager.

One last thought: you might also consider waiting to see what they come back with tomorrow before deciding. If they return with a genuinely good offer that addresses the scope issue fairly, at least you'll be declining with full information. But if your gut is already telling you no, there's nothing wrong with getting ahead of it — especially since nothing is signed.

Hope I'm getting fired tomorrow.

I made a huge mistake at work, well actually a tiny mistake that had huge repercussions. It was a careless mistake that I own, but also see it was inevitable. I'm so burned out and have been for so long something had to break. I'm at the point where I hope they fire me.

47, highly specialized, deeply experienced, haven't been unemployed in 20 years. I also have 3 school age kids, a failing marriage, and have been the sole breadwinner for our family for the last 15 years. I've climbed the ladder well, but not because I want to, because my kids need to eat. Haven't taken a vacation longer than a 4 day weekend in a decade. No support because its just me and wife won't get a job outside the house, despite me begging her to for years. Then there is the general state of everything, rising prices, wars, our country tearing itself apart at the seams.

I'm tired boss, real tired.

Jobadvisor

That's a heavy load you've been carrying. For a long time.

What strikes me is that you said the mistake was tiny but also inevitable. That's not rationalization — that's clarity. When someone is running on empty for years, with no relief valve, no backup, no real rest... something was always going to give. The miracle is that it took this long.

The burnout you're describing isn't laziness or weakness. It's what happens when a person carries everything, alone, indefinitely, with no end in sight. You've been doing the job, climbing a ladder you don't even want to climb, holding a household together, watching a marriage struggle, all while the world outside gets louder and scarier. And you haven't had more than four days off in a decade. That's not sustainable for any human being.

The part where you hope they fire you — I think that's worth sitting with, not dismissing. That's not defeat talking. That's a part of you that is desperately trying to find an exit from something that has become genuinely unbearable. It's a distress signal, not a character flaw.

A few honest thoughts:

Whatever happens tomorrow, the burnout doesn't go away on its own. A job change might create breathing room, but the deeper exhaustion — the kind you're describing — tends to follow you unless something more fundamental shifts. That's not a criticism, it's just worth knowing.

The marriage piece you mentioned quietly, almost in passing. That's not a small thing. A partnership where you've been begging for years for some shared load, and it hasn't come — that's its own separate grief sitting on top of everything else.

And you're 47 with deep experience and a specialized skillset. If they do fire you, you won't be unemployable. That fear is real but it's not the whole picture.

How are you doing right now, tonight? Not tomorrow — tonight.

the complexities of quitting a high-paying job I absolutely despise

32yo. Sorry for eventual awkward English, but I'm not using AI for this. My entire life, I've made decisions based on a fear passed onto me by my mother. If I did not want to be a miserable fuck, I needed to work hard to achieve job stability and financial security. So I listened to her, brushed off my interests in school (humanities, languages, the arts) as impractical hobbies and pursued a career in law. For years, I hated studying law (except for some of the theory), but finished college with amazing grades and, soon after graduation, got myself a decent job at a law firm. Eventually, I found myself a much better position in the public sector of my country, with amazing pay and a very how chance of ever being fired. Security and stability achieved... but the thing is, I absolutely despise my job, to such an extent that it's making life impossible for me. Not only am I overwhelmed by the responsibility, disheartened by the workplace and the productivity that's being demanded of me, I also have deep moral issues with the job and am constantly exposed to systemic injustices I can't do anything about but reproduce or accept, which make me feel disgusted at what I have become. I am mentally and physically exhausted, I don't have the energy to pursue any interests outside of the job at the moment and well, basically, I am desolate. Internally, I know the only possible route out of this agony is to quit the job, even without a backup plan, just because I have absolutely no time or even energy to build one. I probably need a new career altogether. I am single, no kids, so I have no one to support, though my family’s been counting on my money for lots of things (helping sister out with tuition, etc). I do have savings, they are enough to support me for at least four years if my expenses are reasonable. Obviously, quitting a high-paying well-regarded job will result in consequences, both on an individual scale and a social one. I am scared of what this will mean for me: did I fail at being a functional adult? am I failing my family (they already made sure to tell me I am…)? am I fantasizing about an impossible future? Is all work under capitalism supposed to be this soul-crushing?

Jobadvisor

What you're describing isn't a career problem. It's a self-reclamation problem. And those are much harder, much more serious, and much more worth solving.

A few things strike me reading this.

You didn't make a mistake. You executed someone else's plan perfectly. Your mother's fear was real — it came from somewhere, probably from scarcity or watching people she loved suffer without security. You internalized it, you worked extraordinarily hard, and you delivered exactly what that fear demanded. The problem isn't that you failed. It's that you succeeded at the wrong goal. That's actually a more disorienting place to be than failure, because failure gives you permission to change course. Success doesn't.

The moral exhaustion you're describing is important — don't minimize it. Burnout from overwork is one thing. What you're describing is something heavier: being made complicit in things that violate your own sense of justice, daily, with no exit valve. That's not weakness or sensitivity. That's your conscience working correctly. The fact that it's unbearable is a sign that something in you is still intact.

On the question of whether you're "failing at being a functional adult" — I'd push back on the premise. The functional adult narrative is largely about external markers: stable job, income, reliability to others. You have all of those. What you're considering is trading external functionality for internal survival. That's not failure. That's a different, harder, more honest kind of adulthood.

Your family's reaction deserves some honest examination. They're scared — probably for themselves, partly, because your stability has become load-bearing for them too. That's a real and understandable fear. But it's not the same as them being right. "You're failing us" and "we're scared of losing something we've come to depend on" can sound identical but are very different claims. You're allowed to weigh their needs without being governed by them. You've been supporting your sister's tuition — that's generous, not obligatory. Those arrangements can be wound down with notice and care.

On the practical side, four years of runway is genuinely significant. Most people contemplating this have four months. You have four years. That's not nothing — that's enough time to experiment, fail, experiment again, and find something. You don't need a plan before you quit. You need enough stability to survive while you figure out what the plan is. You have that.

The deeper question you're asking — is all work supposed to be this soul-crushing? — the honest answer is: no, but also, work under any system will always have friction, tedium, and compromise. The difference is between work that grinds against your core and work that doesn't. Some people find work in the humanities, languages, or arts that pays poorly but sustains them. Some find unexpected corners of those fields that pay reasonably. Some find that just removing the moral injury is enough — that a boring, lower-paid job they feel neutral about gives them enough life back to actually live outside of it. You don't know yet which of those is you. You can't know from inside the cage.

What I'd actually encourage you to think about: not "what career should I have" — that's too big a question to answer right now — but rather, what does the first six months after quitting look like? Sleep. Physical recovery. Slowly reacquainting yourself with what you actually enjoy. That's not laziness. That's defragging a system that's been running at 100% with no maintenance for years. The clarity about what comes next usually doesn't arrive until after the decompression.

You're 32, single, solvent, childless, clearly intelligent, and still have enough self-awareness to know something is deeply wrong. Those are remarkable conditions for reinvention. The risks are real but they're not as catastrophic as they feel from inside an exhausted mind that's been told its whole life that security is the only thing standing between you and misery.

The misery is already here. That changes the calculus.

Hour changed by manager

So I work 4 tens. My hours were 5 am to 3 pm. Manager changed my hours to 6am to 4pm. So he called me in his office on Friday to comment that he stopped by my office at 5:30 am (that’s the time he arrives) and I wasn’t there. Took everything in me not to say no shit you changed my hours. We are salaried and no overtime is permitted. However the company says OT doesn’t start till you hit 45 hours. So 5 hours of free time. Now my manager says I can come in at 5 but my time doesn’t start to 6. Four hours of free time a week as long as I don’t go over 45. I said see you at 6 and excused myself from his office.

Jobadvisor

That was the perfect response honestly. "See you at 6" and walking out is clean, professional, and leaves nothing to argue with.

The situation is pretty telling — he changed your hours, then called you in for not being there at his arrival time like that's somehow on you. That's either a lack of self-awareness or a slow-walk attempt to pressure you into earlier hours without officially changing them back.

The "you can come in at 5 but your time doesn't start until 6" thing is worth noting. That's him essentially asking for free labor dressed up as a perk. You clocked that immediately and shut it down correctly.

You're salaried on a 4x10 schedule with defined hours — 6 to 4 is your schedule now. Showing up at 6 is doing your job. Unless something is actually on fire that requires you before 6, you owe nothing before that.