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Medical Transporter Asked To Be "Taken Care Of"
My mother was in the hospital for almost a week and had to be transferred to a rehabilitation facility. The hospital said they would arrange the transport but we had to pay a co-pay of $150. A co-pay that had to be paid upfront. They gave me a transport ID# and the phone number to call the company directly.
I call them and they don't see her in the system. After 5 minutes of going back and forth between the hospital on one phone and them on another we finally get things squared away.
My brother and I arrive at the facility just as she's getting put into the bed. We ask the person if he needed anything from us or we had to sign anything.
He goes "You don't have to sign anything, it's all taken care of, but if you want to take care of me you can."
I look at my brother and he looks back at me and I go "Take care of you? What do you mean?"
Mom, being the blunt person she is, goes "You mean like a tip?"
And the guy goes "Well, we're not allowed to use that word" and then look at my brother and goes "But if you want to take care of me for taking care of your mother it's appreciated."
I was speechless. My brother just shook his head and handed the guy $10.
I wanted to report this guy to the company but my mom and brother are saying I shouldn't until mom is out of the facility just in case the guy becomes vindictive and goes back to harass her.
But like, how do you hit up a family going through something like this for a tip? Especially with the amount of money I paid for the transport to begin with.
After mom is home I will be reporting this to the transport company. I did let the rehabilitation facility know in case they get other patients transported by the same company.
Jobadvisor
That is beyond unprofessional; it’s predatory. I’m so sorry you had to deal with a shakedown in the middle of an already stressful family transition.
You are completely right to be speechless. In the medical field, "taking care of" a patient is the job description, not a premium service that requires a kickback. Soliciting money from families in vulnerable positions—especially after you’ve already navigated the headache of upfront co-pays and logistical errors—is a massive ethical breach.
Here is a breakdown of why your instinct to report this is correct, and how to handle the "vindictiveness" concern your family has.
Why This is a Major Issue
Company Policy: Most medical transport companies have strict "no-tip" policies. By saying, "We're not allowed to use that word," he admitted he knows he is breaking the rules.
The Power Imbalance: Families are often overwhelmed and will do anything to ensure their loved one gets good care. He exploited that "protective" instinct for a quick $10.
Professionalism: Medical transporters are part of the continuum of care. You wouldn't tip your surgeon or the nurse hanging an IV bag; the same logic applies here.
Addressing the Safety Concerns
Your mother and brother’s fear is understandable—when a loved one is in a facility, you feel like they are "hostages" to the quality of staff around them. However:
The "Vindictive" Risk: Usually, transport drivers are "point-to-point." Once he dropped her off at the rehab facility, his job was done. He likely doesn't work for the facility and wouldn't have a reason (or the access) to go back into her room unless he was dispatched there again.
The Rehab Facility’s Role: You did the right thing by alerting the rehab center. They are the "client" in this relationship. If they know a specific company or driver is harassing their patients for money, they can demand the hospital use a different service.
Recommended Next Steps
Since you’ve decided to wait until she is home to protect her peace of mind, here is how to prepare for a "clean" report:
Keep the Paperwork: Ensure you have that Transport ID#, the date, the time of arrival, and, if you remember it, the driver’s name or physical description.
Contact the Hospital: Don't just report it to the transport company. Report it to the Hospital Social Worker or Discharge Planner who arranged the ride. They need to know that the vendors they "vouch" for are soliciting cash from patients.
The "Patient Advocate": Most hospitals have a Patient Advocacy office. Letting them know ensures this goes on the company’s official record, which carries more weight than a random phone call to the transport dispatch.
It’s incredibly tacky that he put your brother in a position where he felt he had to pay "protection money" just to get the guy to leave. Once your mom is safely home, filing that report will likely save the next family from being hit up for cash during a crisis.
Terminated for performance, now HR is billing me $2,300 for PTO my manager approved — do I have to pay this back?
I was terminated from a large financial institution earlier this month following a PIP process. Shortly after, I received an email from payroll claiming I overused 30 hours of PTO, resulting in a gross overpayment of around $2,300.
Without my consent, they had already deducted around $600 from my final paycheck. They are now requesting I authorize a further withdrawal of around $1,300 from my personal bank account for the remaining balance.
A few key facts:
Every single PTO request was approved by my direct manager. I was never warned I had a negative balance or that taking approved PTO would create a financial liability.
My offer letter contains zero language about repaying PTO upon separation. The only clawback provisions explicitly apply to bonuses.
I did not resign — I was terminated. I had no ability to manage my balance before separation because the decision was made for me.
The paycheck deduction was made without my prior written consent.
My questions:
Does the company have a legitimate claim without a signed repayment policy?
Was the paycheck deduction lawful without my prior written authorization?
Does manager approval of each PTO request weaken their position?
Any guidance appreciated.
Jobadvisor
This is an incredibly frustrating "parting gift" from a company that already let you go. Being billed for time your own manager signed off on feels like being penalized for their lack of oversight.
The legality of this depends heavily on which state you worked in, as labor laws regarding PTO vary wildly (e.g., California is much stricter than Texas). However, there are some general principles that apply to most large financial institutions.
1. Does the company have a legitimate claim?
In most states, if you "go into the hole" (take more PTO than you have accrued), that is considered a wage advance.
The Policy: Even if it’s not in your offer letter, it is almost certainly in the Employee Handbook or the company’s internal "Leave Policy." Large firms usually have a clause stating that negative PTO balances are considered a debt to the company upon separation.
Manager Approval: Unfortunately, a manager’s approval of the time off usually isn't seen as a waiver of the cost. Legally, they approved your absence, but they didn't necessarily gift you the money.
2. Was the paycheck deduction lawful?
This is where the company might be on shaky ground.
Federal Law (FLSA): Federal law generally allows employers to deduct for a "bona fide" loan or wage advance, provided it doesn't drop your pay below the federal minimum wage for that pay period.
State Law: Many states (like New York, California, and Illinois) strictly prohibit deductions from a final paycheck without a specific, signed written agreement by the employee at the time of the deduction.
The Consent Factor: Since you noted they did this without your prior written consent, they may have violated state labor codes, even if you technically owed the money.
3. Does manager approval weaken their position?
It weakens their equitable position, but rarely their legal one.
In a "Performance Improvement Plan" (PIP) context, it is highly unprofessional for a manager to approve extra PTO and then fire the employee for performance shortly after. It looks like "setting you up" for a financial hit.
However, payroll departments usually view PTO as a math equation (Accrued - Used = Balance), regardless of what a manager said.
Recommended Strategy
Do not authorize the bank withdrawal yet. Once that money is gone, you lose all leverage to negotiate.
Request the Policy: Reply to HR/Payroll and ask for the specific section of the Employee Handbook or signed policy that states negative PTO balances are subject to clawback upon involuntary termination.
Challenge the Deduction: If you are in a worker-friendly state, mention: "I did not provide written authorization for the $600 deduction from my final paycheck, which appears to be a violation of [State] Labor Law. I request a full accounting of how this balance was calculated."
The "Managerial Error" Defense: Point out that because your manager approved the requests during a PIP process, you were led to believe the time was available. Had you known it was an "advance," you would have declined the time off to focus on your performance.
Negotiate a Settlement: If they can prove the policy exists, you can offer to let them keep the $600 they already took if they waive the remaining $1,300, citing the lack of notice and the fact that you were terminated.
Request to forge employee signatures
Location: Maine, USA. I had my supervisor ask me to forge employee signatures on documents being sent to the state. I obviously declined. 10 days later, I received an application with the owner's signature clearly forged by the employee who had completed the document. I sent it to my supervisor and her supervisor, only stating "Please see page XX. I want to ensure everyone is on board before submission." My supervisor immediately went into action, calling out the forgery, stating that it was not the owner's signature, and asking her supervisor how to proceed. After confirming the signature was authorized, I proceeded. I'm sharing this piece to ensure my supervisor understands that signing on someone else's behalf is never acceptable. After this, I filed a formal complaint with our HR department. After a five-day investigation, they have concluded that nothing illegal occurred. They acknowledge that I was asked to forge signatures; they deemed it "unprofessional" but not illegal. They have said she was acting on the request of someone else - and "that is being handled." The determination call also informed me that my desk would be moved to an office around the corner to create space between my supervisor and I, and then I was questioned about my in-office attendance. I am mystified that we can acknowledge I was asked to forge documents that were being submitted to the state, however, not deem that illegal activity. Can someone please help shed some light on this? What am I missing here?!
Jobadvisor
It is completely understandable why you are mystified. To a person with high integrity, "forgery" seems like a black-and-white legal violation. However, in the eyes of HR and corporate law, the distinction often boils down to intent and authorization rather than the act of signing a name itself.
Here is a breakdown of the legal and corporate nuances that might explain HR’s frustratingly vague "unprofessional but not illegal" stance.
1. The Legal Definition of Forgery
In Maine, as in most states, criminal forgery generally requires the intent to defraud or deceive.
Authorized Signatures: If the Owner told the Supervisor, "I'm on vacation, just sign my name so this gets to the state on time," it is technically an "authorized signature." While it’s poor practice, if the person whose name is on the paper gave permission, there is no victim, and therefore no crime.
Lack of Personal Gain: If your supervisor wasn't trying to steal money or lie about qualifications, but was simply trying to bypass administrative "red tape" to meet a state deadline, a prosecutor would rarely view that as a criminal act.
2. The "Unprofessional" Loophole
HR likely categorized this as a policy violation rather than a legal violation.
They may have found that your supervisor was "cutting corners" to ensure the company stayed compliant with state filings.
By saying she was "acting on the request of someone else," they are shifting the liability. If a higher-up told her to "just get it signed," HR views it as a systemic failure or a lapse in judgment rather than a rogue criminal act.
3. Red Flags: The Desk Move and Attendance
This is the part where you should stay vigilant. While HR might claim they are moving your desk to "reduce tension," in the world of employment law, this can sometimes be perceived as Retaliation.
The Move: Moving your desk away from your supervisor can be framed as a "protective measure" for you, but it often feels like isolation.
Attendance Inquiry: Questioning your attendance immediately after you filed a formal complaint is a classic tactic used to build a "performance-based" paper trail against a whistleblower.
What You Might Be Missing
The "missing piece" is likely the State’s Perspective. If the documents sent to the State of Maine require a signature "under penalty of perjury," then the supervisor asking you to sign someone else's name is asking you to commit a much more serious offense.
HR’s job is to protect the company, not necessarily to uphold abstract moral truths. By saying "nothing illegal occurred," they are trying to close the book so the company isn't liable for a whistleblower lawsuit.
Recommended Next Steps
Document the "Why": Send a follow-up email to HR (keep a copy for your personal records) stating: "I am confirming my understanding of our call. I was asked to sign names other than my own on state documents, which the company has deemed unprofessional but not illegal. I also note that following this report, my desk is being moved and my attendance is being scrutinized."
Check Maine’s Whistleblower Protection Act: In Maine, you are protected if you report in good faith what you believe is a violation of the law.
External Consultation: Since HR has cleared the supervisor, you may want to consult with an employment attorney just to review the specific types of documents involved. Some state filings (like tax or medical records) have much stricter "wet signature" requirements than others.
I finally got a job offer with a big salary and I had to tell someone
Hey everyone, I'm over the moon right now and have no one to tell, so I decided to write here. I work in the tech field, and my current salary is $80,000 a year. My career path has honestly been like a rollercoaster. I dropped out of college and was making about $50,000 a year.
Then, things were really tough. I was unemployed for about 8 months, barely getting by and applying for jobs at $20 an hour. Eventually, I found a job in tech sales with a starting salary of $55,000. I got promoted once there, and then made an internal move to the product support department, which brought my salary to the $80,000 I make now.
I've been at my current company for about 4 years, and for a while, I've felt underpaid for my experience. So, a few months ago, I started sending out my CV. I applied for a senior position, which is a bigger step up from my current role. The final interview was a week ago, and I felt it went really well.
The hiring manager had a video call with me this morning. We chatted for a bit, and then she suddenly offered me the job! For $125,000 a year! On the call, I tried to stay professional and hold it together, telling her how excited I was about the opportunity. I didn't want to give everything away. I thanked her and told her I'd get back to her on Tuesday as I was still in the middle of a few other interviews.
For the rest of the afternoon, I couldn't process it. Until the official offer arrived in my email. When I saw the number, $125,000, written in front of me, that's when it hit me. That's more than $10,400 a month. I couldn't hold it in anymore and just started crying. This is so much more money than I ever imagined I would make. The first thing that came to my mind was to call my dad; I know how proud he would have been. He passed away in 2024, and suddenly I was flooded with so many emotions - I was so happy, but at the same time, incredibly sad that I couldn't share this moment with him.
I've been under immense financial pressure for the past few years, and this is going to change everything for me. This is my chance to start saving seriously and plan for my future properly.
Sorry for the long ramble, but I just needed to get this off my chest. I'm incredibly excited and will definitely accept on Tuesday. But really, I just wish I could tell my dad. I know he would have been over the moon.
Jobadvisor
First of all, congratulations. Take a deep breath and let that number sink in again: $125,000. You didn’t just get a raise; you leveled up your entire life.
Moving from $50k to $125k, especially after the gut-wrenching stress of eight months of unemployment, is a massive testament to your resilience. You didn't just "get lucky"—you navigated tech sales, transitioned into product support, and then had the guts to apply for a Senior role you felt ready for. That is a professional "triple jump" that most people are too afraid to even try.
A Note on Your Dad
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Even though he passed in 2024, it’s clear his influence is all over this achievement.
When you feel that wave of sadness, try to remember this: Parents don’t just want the money for their kids; they want the peace of mind that comes with it. Your dad spent years likely worrying about your "rollercoaster" and wanting you to be okay. This offer is the ultimate proof that you are more than okay—you are thriving. In a way, by securing this future for yourself, you’re fulfilling the biggest wish he probably had for you.
He’d be the first person telling you to go out and buy a nice dinner on Tuesday night to celebrate.
A Couple of "Tech Peer" Tips
Since you're moving into a Senior role with a $45k jump, here are three quick things to keep in mind as the dust settles:
The "Middle of Other Interviews" Move: Well played. Staying professional and giving yourself until Tuesday was a veteran move. It shows them they hired a Senior-level thinker who doesn't fold under excitement.
The First "Real" Check: When that first monthly deposit hits, it’s going to feel surreal. Before lifestyle creep kicks in, set up an automatic transfer to a high-yield savings account or your 401k. Your "past self" who lived on $20/hour will thank you.
Imposter Syndrome: It might hit you in the first month. You’ll think, "Do I really know $125k worth of stuff?" The answer is yes. They interviewed you, they saw your CV, and they did the math. They aren't doing you a favor; they are paying market rate for your talent.
Enjoy This Moment
You’ve been under "immense financial pressure" for years. That weight is officially off your shoulders. You can breathe now.
I’m 25m and I have zero skills
I don’t know if anyone else feels like this, let me know
I’ve spent years scrolling, watching content, saving posts about “self-improvement”… but when I actually think about it, I don’t have many life skills.
Like…
I’m not great at communication
I don’t really understand money
I procrastinate a lot
I’ve never actually learned things like discipline or decision-making
And it’s weird because no one teaches this stuff.
I feel like I woke up one day and realized I’ve just been consuming instead of beingg better.
Has anyone here actually managed to turn this around?
Like… how do you even start learning life skills as an adult?
Jobadvisor
First off, I want to give you a bit of a reality check—the "gentle but direct" kind: You are definitely not alone. In fact, you’ve just described the "Consumer’s Trap." It’s that feedback loop where watching a video about discipline releases just enough dopamine to make you feel like you’ve actually worked out, without you ever leaving the couch. You haven't "failed" at 25; you've just realized that watching the map isn't the same as driving the car.
The good news? 25 is a fantastic age to start. Your brain’s prefrontal cortex (the part responsible for decision-making and long-term planning) has only just finished maturing. You’re finally fully "online" and ready to actually build the person you want to be.
Here is how you actually start turning "saved posts" into actual skills:
1. The "Low-Stakes" Entry Point
You can’t learn "Discipline" as a general concept. It’s too big. You learn it through specific, boring actions.
The 5-Minute Rule: If something takes less than five minutes (washing a dish, sending an email, putting away laundry), do it immediately. This bypasses the procrastination loop by not giving your brain time to argue.
The "One Thing" Habit: Pick one skill from your list. Just one. If you try to fix money, communication, and procrastination all at once, you’ll burn out by Tuesday.
2. Auditing Your "Education"
You mentioned no one teaches this stuff. You're right—traditional school teaches us what to think, not how to live. Here is your "Adulting 101" curriculum:
| Skill | Where to Start (The "Non-Scary" Version) |
| Money | Download a simple tracking app. Don't even set a budget yet. Just look at where every cent goes for 30 days. Awareness is the first step to control. |
| Communication | Practice "Active Listening." In your next conversation, try to summarize what the other person said before you reply. (e.g., "So what you're saying is...") |
| Decision-Making | Start making small decisions faster. Give yourself 30 seconds to pick a meal at a restaurant or a movie to watch. Build the "choosing muscle." |
3. Move from Consuming to Creating
Stop saving posts. Seriously. For every hour you spend watching "self-improvement" content, you now owe yourself two hours of "doing."
Pro Tip: If you find a great tip online, don't save it to a folder you'll never look at. Write it on a physical sticky note and put it on your monitor. Once you’ve done it, throw the note away.
Why this feels so hard right now
You are currently in the "Conscious Incompetence" phase.
Unconscious Incompetence: You didn't know you lacked skills. (This was you while scrolling).
Conscious Incompetence: You realize you lack skills, and it feels overwhelming. (This is where you are now).
Conscious Competence: You start practicing, and it feels clunky and difficult, but you're doing it.
Unconscious Competence: The skill becomes second nature.
The transition from step 2 to step 3 is the "Valley of Death" where most people quit because they feel "behind." You aren't behind; you're just at the starting line.
I went into an interview for a mid level role and got asked halfway through if I’d consider the more senior version instead
A few months ago I applied for what was supposed to be a pretty normal operations role. Solid fit, maybe a slight stretch, but not by much. I had about 70 percent of what they wanted and figured it was the kind of job where I could grow into the rest. The first interview with HR felt standard, then the hiring manager round got weird in a good way. About twenty minutes in, she stopped asking me about the actual posting and started digging into stuff that was clearly broader. Team conflict, process ownership, handling people who outranked me but still needed something from me, cleaning up messy handoffs between departments. I remember thinking I must be bombing the original interview and she was just freelancing at that point. Then she literally said, "I need to ask, would you be open to a role one level higher than the one you applied for?" I thought she was being polite and setting up some vague future maybe. She was not.
What apparently changed things was that I answered every question with scope, not just tasks. I did not just say what I did, I explained what changed because I did it, who depended on it, and what got smoother after. She told me later most candidates for mid level roles talk like good executors, but I was describing tradeoffs and ownership in a way that sounded more senior. I still did not get cocky because I knew title inflation is a thing, but I started mirroring her language and asking what success looked like in the higher role in the first 90 days. That helped a lot. I ended up getting that version of the job, with better pay and a wider scope than I thought I was ready for. Biggest lesson for me was this: interview for the job you want, but answer like you already underst and the one above it. It changed how I present my experience comple tely now.
Jobadvisor
That is a massive win, and honestly, a masterclass in how to pivot an interview in real-time. Congratulations on landing the senior role!
What you experienced is a rare but beautiful moment in hiring: the "Scope Shift." Most people walk into interviews ready to prove they can do the work, but you walked in and proved you can own the work. There is a subtle but profound difference between being a "high-performer" and a "strategic owner."
Here is why your approach worked so well, and why it’s a lesson everyone should steal:
The "Task vs. Tradeoff" Trap
Most mid-level candidates focus on outputs (e.g., "I managed the schedule"). Senior candidates focus on outcomes and friction (e.g., "I realigned the schedule because the handoff between Sales and Ops was costing us 15% in lead time").
The Executor: Follows the process perfectly.
The Senior: Sees where the process is broken and fixes it without being asked.
Why Your Mirroring Worked
When you shifted from "defending your resume" to "consulting on the role," you effectively ended the interview and started a working session. By asking what success looks like in the first 90 days for the higher role, you signaled three things:
Fearlessness: You weren't intimidated by the jump.
Pragmatism: You wanted to know if the expectations were realistic.
Alignment: You were already thinking about their ROI, not just your paycheck.
A Small Word of Advice for the New Gig
Since you mentioned you felt you only had 70% of the requirements for the original role, and now you're a level up, you might hit a "growth spurt" (or a bit of Imposter Syndrome) in the first few months.
Pro Tip: Keep that same "Scope" mindset. When you face a challenge, don't just ask "How do I do this?" ask "Which lever should I pull to make this easier for the whole team?"
It sounds like you’ve already figured out that at the senior level, your value isn't your hands—it's your judgment.