Just quit, 1 week after starting because of massive bait and switch tactic
I started a job last Monday that was for “copy writer and social media manager”
In the job listing, it was described as primarily copywriting with social media account management, with copy as primary, socials as secondary. 1-2 days in office a month, otherwise remote. This is also what was discussed in the interview.
So to my shock, my first day when I arrive in person, I’m handed a sheet with all my info regarding responsibilities, and it is COMPLETELY different.
It now says :
Social media account manager Copy writer Community engagement Graphic design
Graphic design was NEVER mentioned to me prior. Not once. And it was NOT in the job description.
They gave me 15 clients a month. For all these areas. Mind you the other copy and social media account manager only does copy and socials, for 5 accounts a month.
Also, mind you they have 2 in house graphic designers with less clients than they gave me. AND they had originally had a job posting up for engagement coordinator, but decided to add that on to my role, without discussing with me.
Long story short, the first week was insane, from how they communicate on what’s app, morning of, asking me to come in for the day, to giving me 7+ massive clients a month for graphic design ON TOP of the social media management, copywriting and community engagement.
Along with other red flags, I sent an invoice for the week of work, and quit today.
Jobadvisor
Ouch. That isn’t just a "pivot"—that’s a full-on bait and switch. Honestly, reading that list of responsibilities made my digital circuits itch.
You were hired to be a writer and strategist, but they tried to turn you into a one-person creative agency for 15 clients. Expecting a new hire to handle graphic design, community management, and a massive client load—all while ignoring the remote agreement—is a textbook example of a "burnout factory."
You absolutely made the right call. Here is a breakdown of why your "quitting reflex" was spot on:
The Red Flag Breakdown
The Scope Creep: Going from 5 accounts (the internal standard) to 15 is a 300% workload increase before you've even found the coffee machine.
The "Shadow" Role: Folding the "Engagement Coordinator" role into yours without a conversation (or a raise) is a sign they don't value specialized skill sets; they just want "bodies" to fill gaps.
Boundary Blurring: WhatsApp messages on the morning of, demanding you come into the office, completely invalidates the "1-2 days a month" remote agreement. It shows a total lack of respect for your time and autonomy.
Resource Mismanagement: Having in-house designers with fewer clients than you—while forcing you to do your own design—is just bizarre management. It suggests the workflow is chaotic and logic-free.
Protecting Yourself Now
Since you've already sent the invoice and the "I quit" email, here are a few things to keep an eye on:
The Final Paycheck: In many jurisdictions, "invoicing" implies contract work, but if you were hired as an employee, there are specific legal timelines for your final pay. Keep a copy of that original job description and your signed offer letter just in case they contest the hours worked.
The "Why" Brief: If you feel like being professional (though you certainly don't owe them more labor), you can keep your parting words brief: "The role requirements and in-office expectations shifted significantly from the initial job description and interview discussions, making this a poor fit."
The Portfolio: Since you did the work for a week, you still have the right to mention the brands you worked on (unless you signed a very restrictive NDA).
Your Career Pivot
Don't let this week make you doubt your skills. You were hired for a specific, high-level role because you’re good at it. This company didn't want a Copywriter; they wanted a miracle worker on a budget.
Gave my two week's notice. Manager is upset that I didn't give "advanced notice" of my two week's notice.
(USA) I work in retail under toxic management. I got the job two years ago. I hated the job on the first day but figured I'd hold out for at least 5 years because the job market is so tough.
I couldn't take it anymore so I gave my two week's notice on Thursday (I do have another job lined up). I live in an at-will state but still gave two week's as a courtesy.
My direct manager, who is pretty much the reason why I'm quitting, got upset that it's "too much of a sudden notice" and that I should have given more "advanced notice" before giving my two week's. She's demanding that my two week's should be the advanced notice so I should stay another two weeks for the actual notice. It was very confusing what she was trying to say but essentially she wanted a 1 month notice (I think).
I told her that it's not a sudden notice since I'm giving two week's and being two week's is the advanced notice.
She then tried to guilt trip me by saying that now I will further burden my coworkers because we are chronically short-staffed. She asked who will be doing the night shift (since I was the only one who did most of the night shifts). She asked whether I won't feel bad for making my coworkers lose their job if the store ends up closing due to lack of staff to cover the necessary shifts.
I told her that should be her job as the manager to figure out staffing issues. That she should be damn glad that at least I'm giving her two weeks.
Jobadvisor
Whew. The mental gymnastics your manager is performing right now could win an Olympic gold medal.
To be clear: "Advanced notice of a two-week notice" is not a thing. That is just a one-month notice with a fancy, manipulative hat on. In an at-will state, you are technically allowed to walk out mid-shift and never look back. Giving two weeks is the professional gold standard, and her attempt to move the goalposts is a classic sign of someone who has failed at their own job—resource management—and is trying to make it your problem.
The Reality Check
Staffing is not your burden: If the store closes because one retail employee left, that isn't a "you" problem; that’s a catastrophic failure of business ownership.
The "Guilt Trip": Using your coworkers as shields is the ultimate toxic management move. They are short-staffed because the environment is likely unbearable (as you've experienced), not because you found a better life for yourself.
The "Night Shift" Dilemma: She is the manager. Her job title literally defines her as the person responsible for "managing" the schedule. If no one is there to work the night shift, she works the night shift. That is why she gets the manager salary.
How to Handle the Next 13 Days
Since you have another job lined up, you have all the leverage here. You don't need a reference from someone this delusional.
Hold the Line: Do not engage in "negotiations" about your end date. You have stated your final day. That date is now a fixed point in time.
Document the Conversation: If she continues to harass or guilt-trip you, send a brief email to her (and CC HR if they exist) stating: "Per our conversation, my final day will be [Date]. I am happy to use my remaining time to hand over tasks, but my end date is non-negotiable."
The "At-Will" Card: If the environment becomes truly hostile or the guilt-tripping turns into verbal abuse, remember that "at-will" works both ways. You are giving two weeks as a courtesy. If they make those two weeks miserable, you can rescind the courtesy and make your final day "effective immediately."
You were incredibly sharp to tell her that staffing is her job. Don't let her noise get in your head—you've already won by getting out.
Being made invisible at a job where you mattered… How do you cope?
I've been at the same company for 8 years. I was responsible for the communications/PR function all by myself and was good at it. About 2 years ago a new head of marketing arrived, restructured things, and slowly made my role peripheral. He brought in someone new and the two of them now run everything I used to run. And as for routine comms tasks he prefers the colleague I had originally mentored because she has no history attached to her role and is a proper yes-man colleague.
The new CMO didn't hire me, so he simply doesn't care about me — I get that logically, but it still hurts. Important meetings happen in other cities without me now. I still show up, I still do my work, but I'm essentially invisible. Last week I flagged that we shouldn't publish something — was ignored. A colleague said the same thing with slightly different framing and was immediately agreed with. That kind of thing happens regularly now.
I am genuinely nauseous when I see their names in my inbox. Like, I can barely tolerate any Teams message…even the one that says “hi team!”… But I can't leave yet: I'm applying for citizenship in a few months and need clean, uninterrupted payslips to show. My original manager has confirmed there are no internal opportunities and has implicitly encouraged me to look externally. Soooo, I'm stuck here, showing up every day, trying not to fall apart. I’m either stuck or waiting till they fire me.
Has anyone been through this slow erasure at a job where you used to feel like you mattered? How did you survive it without completely losing your mind — or your sense of self?
Jobadvisor
I am so sorry you’re going through this. There is a specific, sharp kind of grief that comes with being "gaslit" out of a role you built from the ground up. It’s not just about the work; it’s the systematic stripping away of your professional identity while you’re still standing in the room.
The nausea you feel isn't just "stress"—it’s your body’s physiological response to an environment that has become psychologically unsafe. Since you are in a "holding pattern" for your citizenship, your goal has to shift from thriving to surviving with your dignity intact.
Here is a strategy for navigating this "slow erasure" without losing your mind.
1. The "Mercenary" Mindset Shift
Right now, you are viewing this through the lens of a dedicated, 8-year veteran. That person is being hurt. To survive, you need to adopt the mindset of a highly-paid contractor.
The Transaction: You are providing "clean payslips" for your citizenship; they are providing the salary. That is the only contract that matters right now.
Detach from Outcomes: When you flag a risk and they ignore you, your job is done. You did your duty. If the ship hits an iceberg because they ignored the lookout, that is no longer your burden to carry. Document your advice in an email, then let it go.
2. Emotional Distancing (Gray Rocking)
Since even a "Hi team!" message triggers nausea, you need to lower the "surface area" of your heart at work.
Mute the Noise: If possible, mute non-essential Teams channels. Check them on your schedule, not when the notification pings.
The "Invisible" Benefit: If they aren't looking at you, stop looking at them. Use the extra mental bandwidth to focus on your citizenship paperwork, research your next career move, or learn a new skill on the company dime.
Stop Mentoring: It sounds harsh, but if your former mentee has chosen the "yes-man" path to bypass you, stop investing your emotional energy in their growth. Be professional, but pivot to "polite stranger" energy.
3. Build a "Bridge to the Future"
The feeling of being "stuck" is what causes the most despair. You need to remind your brain that this is temporary.
The Countdown: Literally mark the day you submit your citizenship application on a private calendar. Every "invisible" day is one day closer to your freedom.
External Validation: Reach out to old colleagues or industry peers who do respect you. Have coffee with them. Remind yourself that your 8 years of expertise haven't vanished just because one CMO has a blind spot.
Resume "Translation": Start writing your resume now. Don't describe your current "invisible" state; describe the 8 years of PR infrastructure you built. That is your reality; the CMO’s version is the fiction.
4. Protecting Your Health
Nausea is a serious warning sign of burnout and chronic stress.
Create a "Work Vestibule": Have a rigid ritual for when you finish work. Change your clothes, go for a walk, or listen to specific music. Physically "wash off" the invisibility before you enter your personal life.
Check Your "Why": Remind yourself: "I am doing this for my citizenship. This is a sacrifice I am choosing to make for my future self." Reframing it as a choice rather than a sentence can reduce the feeling of powerlessness.
A Note on the "Firing" Fear
If they are ignoring you and excluding you, they are likely hoping you will quit so they don't have to pay severance or deal with the paperwork. In many ways, being "invisible" is the safest way to stay employed until your citizenship clears—you aren't a threat, and you aren't "underperforming" enough to trigger a messy HR exit.
You mattered for 8 years, and you will matter again at the next place. This current chapter isn't the story of your career; it’s just a very boring, frustrating subplot you have to endure to get to the next book.
I finally withdrew after they requested an eighth interview and an endless amount of nonsense?
This is a bit of a long story, but I had to get it off my chest. I still can't understand how ridiculous the whole thing was. The summary is at the end.
About six months ago, I found a job on LinkedIn that seemed perfect for me. It was a management position at a mid-sized company in Canada, and it checked all my boxes in terms of salary, title, and responsibilities. The job was posted by an external recruiter, and before I could even finish my application, the guy was messaging me on two different platforms about it. The whole thing seemed too good to be true, and my gut feeling turned out to be right.
Over the next five months, I was dragged through 8 separate interviews for this job:
A pre-screen call with a junior recruiter that somehow lasted 90 minutes. All on Zoom.
An in-person interview with two senior recruiters at their office. This one lasted an hour and a half.
Another in-person interview, this time with the company's HR manager (and one of the recruiters was present as well). Two and a half hours of my life gone.
An in-person interview with my potential direct manager and *his* manager. This took about four hours. It was the first interview in my life where they had to take a 10-minute break in the middle.
An in-person interview with the 'senior leadership' - the COO and a VP. Another two hours.
Then they requested another in-person interview, this time with the team members who would be reporting to me. They said it was to ensure a good 'fit' at all levels. I was skeptical but went along with it. I was asked questions like 'How would you handle it if a team member called in sick on the day of an important deadline?'.
And finally, they requested an eighth interview, this time with the company's founder and CEO. This was the straw that broke the camel's back.
After that seventh interview, I had reached my limit. Almost all the interviews were scheduled at the last minute, often with less than 24 hours' notice, under the pretext that 'it's hard to coordinate everyone's schedules.' Twice, I got an email at 4 PM asking if I could come in the next day at 10 AM.
To make matters worse, between the sixth and seventh interview requests, the recruiter asked for my references and consent for a background check. I thought, okay, this is standard stuff. I sent him the details of 3 references. A few hours later, he sent an email saying they needed a list of 6 people to talk to. I thought, okay, a bit strange since the standard is 3, but I managed to find a few more names. A day later, I got another email saying the company's HR department *also* wanted to speak to their own references - four more, in addition to the six I had already provided. I called the recruiter to object, asking what the point was if they were just going to do the same work. He simply said that this was their process. I was very annoyed, but I found four more people, bringing the total to 10 references.
The next day, the recruiter called the first six. Every single one of them called or messaged me afterward to ask what that weird call was about. The recruiter stayed on the phone with them for about 45 minutes each, asking them overly personal questions about themselves and their work. I was so embarrassed that I treated them all to coffee to apologize. They all told me they had been a reference countless times and had never been vetted like that before.
On top of all that, the whole process was a mess. The recruiter and the company both sent me separate requests for background checks from different companies. They also both sent me links to the same personality assessment. The main recruiter I was dealing with was also unbearably arrogant. Every time I asked him about the process, he would go on about his fancy MBA, as if that explained anything (I have one too, and I wanted to tell him to shove it several times).
I talked it over with a few mentors and some of my references, and they all said the same thing: Do you really want to work for such a chaotic company? This disorganized process is a huge red flag. One of my references is an exec at a big tech company in Toronto, and he told me he hires VPs with four, or at most five, interviews.
So when I got the email requesting the eighth interview with the CEO, I simply said no. I told him to withdraw my application because the company's disorganized culture was clearly not a good fit for me. My phone rang almost immediately. It was the recruiter, and he was clearly panicked. He told me I was their only candidate and that they were ready to make an offer, but they just needed this one final step. Funny, he'd never mentioned I was the only one left before. I stood my ground and told him the entire process had been disrespectful of my time.
Today, I got a call from the 'Managing Partner' of the recruitment firm, trying to smooth things over and get me to change my mind. I considered it for a second, until he said that if they didn't fill this position soon, they would lose their commission because the company would hire another recruitment firm. He said it in a way to make me feel guilty. That's when I snapped. I told him they should be ashamed of themselves, and if they were so worried about their commission, they should have run a hiring process that wasn't such a circus. This company isn't that special, and their demands were outrageous. I went along with every step, but my patience ran out. I told him my decision was final.
I'm 100% sure I dodged a massive bullet. Surely I'm not wrong for thinking that 8 interviews and 10 references over five months is insane, right?
TL;DR - A recruiter and a company demanded 8 interviews, 10 references, and two separate background checks over five months. The whole process was chaotic and disorganized, and they were shocked when I finally said no and withdrew. I'm pretty sure I escaped a nightmare job.
Jobadvisor
You didn't just dodge a bullet; you dodged a thermal-seeking missile.
Read that back to yourself: Eight interviews, ten references, and five months. That isn’t a hiring process; it’s a psychological endurance test. You were 100% right to walk away. In fact, the way they reacted when you withdrew is the ultimate confirmation that your gut was right.
Here is a breakdown of why that "circus" was actually a roadmap of a toxic workplace:
1. The "Analysis Paralysis" Culture
If a company needs eight interviews and ten references to hire a manager, they are terrified of making decisions. Imagine trying to get a budget approved or a strategy signed off once you're actually on the inside. You would have spent your entire career there trapped in a loop of "one more meeting" and "let's check with one more person."
2. The Reference Abuse
Requesting ten references is bordering on professional malpractice by that recruitment firm. They burned your social capital with your mentors and peers for a job you didn't even have yet. A reference is a favor; asking for ten is a sign that they don't trust their own judgment or their own interview process.
3. The "Urgent" Last-Minute Scheduling
The "we can't coordinate schedules" excuse is a massive red flag for a chaotic leadership team. It shows a complete lack of respect for your time and personal life. If they treat a high-level candidate like a puppet on a string, they will treat an employee like an 24/7 on-call servant.
4. The Recruiter’s "Guilt Trip"
The Managing Partner telling you they’d lose their commission if you didn't finish is the height of unprofessionalism. They tried to make their financial failure your moral burden. That is a manipulative tactic used by people who know they’ve bungled a process and are desperate to cover their tracks.
The Reality Check
You mentioned in your previous message that you are currently in a "holding pattern" at your current job while waiting for your citizenship. While that job is making you feel "invisible," this new company would have made you feel insane. Going from a "slow erasure" environment to a "chaotic, indecisive, high-pressure" environment would have been jumping from the freezer into the fire. You need stability and "clean payslips" right now—not a company that changes its mind every five minutes and requires a 10-person jury to decide if you're allowed to buy a stapler.
How do you deal with the constant threat of layoffs in corporate America?
I (29F) have been in the corporate world for about 8 years. During that time, I have been laid off myself, survived rounds of layoffs, seen friends and family be laid off, etc. It never seems to sting any less, and it is so hurtful to see people be laid off multiple times by different companies within the span of a few short years.
For those of you also in corporate America specifically, how do you deal with this? It feels like layoffs are absolutely everywhere no matter how profitable the company is, and that absolutely nothing is stable.
Jobadvisor
It is completely valid to feel exhausted and a bit cynical. You’ve spent nearly a decade in an environment that often treats "human capital" like a line item on a spreadsheet, and seeing that cycle repeat—even at profitable companies—can feel like a betrayal of the "work hard and you'll be fine" promise.
The reality is that "corporate loyalty" has become a one-way street. Dealing with this requires a shift in mindset: moving from seeking stability within a company to building stability within yourself.
Here is how to navigate the psychological and practical weight of the layoff cycle:
1. Decouple Your Identity from Your Job
In your 20s, it's easy to make your job your entire personality. When a layoff hits, it feels like a personal rejection.
The "Mercenary" Mindset: View your employment as a business contract, not a family bond. You are a consultant selling your time and skills to a client (your employer).
Diversify Your Joy: Ensure your self-worth is anchored in hobbies, relationships, or community work that a manager can't take away with a "Meeting Invite: Quick Sync."
2. Financial Offense as Defense
Nothing reduces layoff anxiety faster than knowing you can survive without a paycheck for six months.
The "F-You" Fund: Aim for an emergency fund that is more robust than the standard advice. In a volatile market, 6–9 months of expenses is the "peace of mind" gold standard.
Keep Your "Burn Rate" Low: Even as your salary grows, try to keep your fixed costs (rent, car, subscriptions) as if you were still making your entry-level salary.
3. Maintain "Interview Readiness"
The most stressful part of a layoff is the scramble to update a dusty resume.
The "Brag Sheet": Keep a running document of every win, metric, and project you finish. It’s much harder to remember your impact three years from now.
Always Be Networking: Don't wait until you're unemployed to grab coffee with old colleagues. Make it a goal to talk to one person outside your company once a month.
Skill Up: If your company offers a learning budget, use every cent of it. Acquire skills that make you employable elsewhere, not just better at your current internal processes.
4. Watch the Signs (Without Obsessing)
While you shouldn't live in fear, being observant helps you "pack your parachute" early.
The Vibe Shift: Hiring freezes, travel budget cuts, and sudden "restructuring" announcements are the early warning signs.
Profits $\neq$ Safety: As you noted, profitable companies lay people off to please shareholders.
High-growth tech is often more volatile than "boring" industries like utilities, healthcare, or government-adjacent firms.
Summary of the Shift
| Old Corporate Logic | The New Reality |
| Hard work equals job security. | Hard work equals career security (transferable skills). |
| The company will take care of me. | I am the CEO of my own career. |
| A layoff is a failure. | A layoff is a market correction I can't control. |
It’s okay to feel hurt, but don't let that hurt turn into paralysis. You’ve survived every "worst-case scenario" the corporate world has thrown at you so far—your track record for getting through the "sting" is actually 100%.