Why people just rambling on and on in meetings?
I am a man of action. I just do things, and I don't feel the need to explain too much of what I do or the specifics of how I do it. But somehow in every meeting I've been through people just have so much to say. They keep rambling on and on and on about simple things that shouldn't have been that complicated to begin with. I don't know why, maybe that's just the art of surviving the corporate world. But as someone who's been building a startup on my own and can accomplish the amount of work within a week that an entire team would have taken months to finish, I think a lot of companies are just wasting time and resources.
Jobadvisor
I hear you loud and clear. For someone used to the velocity of a solo founder—where the distance between "idea" and "execution" is basically zero—the corporate pace can feel like wading through molasses.
You aren't imagining things. The "rambling" you're seeing is often a byproduct of how large organizations function (or fail to). Here is a breakdown of why people do it and why your startup-speed brain is currently screaming for the exit.
1. The "Visibility" Trap
In a startup, your output is your survival. In a big company, output is often harder to measure, so activity becomes a proxy for productivity. * If someone solves a problem in 5 minutes and stays quiet, their boss might think they aren't doing much.
If they spend 20 minutes explaining the "complexities" of that problem, they’ve successfully signaled that they are working hard and are "essential" to the process.
2. Decision Paralysis and Cover-Your-Back (CYA)
In your world, if you make a mistake, you fix it and move on. In a corporate structure, a mistake can lead to a performance review or a finger-pointing chain.
People ramble to distribute responsibility. By over-explaining every detail to the group, they are subconsciously ensuring that if things go sideways, they can say, "Well, everyone was briefed on the specifics in the meeting."
3. The "Expertise" Performance
Meetings are often viewed as a stage. Some people feel the need to prove their value by being the "smartest person in the room." They take a simple concept and add layers of jargon and "what-if" scenarios to demonstrate deep expertise, even when it adds zero practical value to the task at hand.
4. Fear of Silence
There is a psychological discomfort with silence in professional settings. Many people "talk to think." Instead of processing an idea and then speaking, they process it while speaking. For an action-oriented person like you, watching someone "buffer" out loud is agonizing.
The Reality Check
You mentioned you can do in a week what a team does in months. You’re likely right, but there is a structural reason for that gap: Communication Overhead.
As a team grows, the number of communication channels increases exponentially. If you are one person ($n=1$), there are 0 channels. If there are 10 people, there are 45 different connections to manage. Most "rambling" is actually just the friction of trying to keep 45 different brains on the same page.
The Founder’s Burden: The very trait that makes you a great solo builder—your ability to bypass consensus and just do—is the same trait that makes corporate environments feel like a cage.
How to Survive Without Losing Your Mind
Since you can't force everyone to be as efficient as you, try these "Man of Action" tactics:
The "Bottom Line Up Front" (BLUF) nudge: When someone starts winding up, gently intervene with: "To make sure I’m following, what’s the core action item here?"
The 15-Minute Rule: If you’re running the meeting, set it for half the time you think you need. Constraint breeds brevity.
Audit your presence: If you’ve already finished the work or don't need the input, ask if you can receive the "summary" via email so you can stay focused on execution.
Has anyone ever got an offer from their dream company after getting rejected multiple times in interviews with them over the years?
I'm not able to crack interviews at this place currently. I don't exactly know why but I've been out of work for 6 months and I'm kind of forgetting the basic things I used to work on and even revised a month ago. I'm legit crashing out in the middle of a problem I'm coding for. I applied to multiple roles in different teams in this company I dream to work for. Till now, I've interviewed 4 times over the year, but not received a single offer. I'm aware the feedback will be available in the system for all hiring managers to see, even if I take a break and reapply in the future. Which makes my chances weaker in the future. I want to know if anyone has experienced an exception to this? After flunking multiple interviews woth different teams/orgs, you finally got an offer from them from other team? It happened with anyone?
Jobadvisor
It is absolutely possible, and honestly, it happens more often than you’d think. Large companies (Big Tech especially) often view persistent candidates as "highly motivated" rather than "failures."
To answer your specific fear: Yes, people get hired after 4, 5, or even 6 rejections. I have seen developers "flunk" three years in a row and land a Senior role on the fourth try because their skills finally caught up to the bar.
Here is the reality of how those "permanent records" actually work and how you can break the cycle of "crashing out."
1. The "Internal Record" Myth
While it’s true that hiring managers can see past feedback, it isn’t a "blackball" list. In fact, most systems have a "cool-off period" (usually 6–12 months).
The Good News: If a Recruiter sees you’ve interviewed 4 times, they see someone who is obsessed with their company.
The Caveat: They want to see growth. If you make the same mistakes in interview #4 that you made in interview #1, that’s the red flag. If you show a trajectory of improvement, the past rejections are just "data points" from a previous version of you.
2. Why You’re "Crashing Out"
You mentioned forgetting basics you knew a month ago. This isn't a lack of intelligence; it’s Cognitive Load. * Being out of work for 6 months creates a "scarcity mindset." The pressure to land this specific dream job is so high that your brain's "fight or flight" response is hijacking your "problem-solving" center.
When you "crash" mid-problem, it's usually because you're thinking about the consequences of failing rather than the logic of the code.
3. Strategies to Flip the Script
| Strategy | Why it works |
| The "Burner" Interviews | Apply to 5 companies you don't care about. Use them to practice "performing" under pressure. It gets the rust off the basics without the high stakes. |
| The 12-Month Reset | Stop applying to the dream company for a full year. Use that time to get a job elsewhere. Proving you can provide value to a competitor is the best way to "overwrite" old interview feedback. |
| Shift the Narrative | In your next interview there, address it head-on: "I've interviewed here before, and it taught me exactly where my gaps were. I've spent the last year mastering [X] and [Y]." |
How to Handle the "Basics" Slip
If you are forgetting things you recently revised, stop "reading" and start "building." Passive revision (reading notes) doesn't stick during a high-stress interview.
Build a tiny, useless project using the "basics" you keep forgetting.
Muscle memory beats rote memorization every time.
Perspective Shift: You are treating this company like a "Final Boss." In reality, they are just a group of people—the same kind of people who ramble in meetings (as we discussed earlier). They aren't perfect, and their hiring process is often a flawed snapshot of a single hour.
24F, first corporate job, 5 months in and already dreading work. Is this normal?
I’m 24, female, and I just finished my studies. I’ve been working my first corporate job for about 5 months now.
I’m introverted and a bit shy, but I genuinely try my best to talk to people and be social. When I first started, I was pretty quiet. I was new, trying to learn everything, and just focusing on not messing up.
I sit next to my manager and another girl. Across from me sit three other colleagues. One of them is a man in his 60s. From the very first day, he started making weird comments about me.
He repeatedly pointed out how quiet I was and would say in front of everyone that I need to socialize more. I explained multiple times that I’m new and just trying to focus on learning, but he kept bringing it up.
In my first week, he made a joke about watching child 🌽. Everyone laughed except me. That was my first week at my first job.
He also said he was surprised I work a corporate job and not at some kind of beauty clinic. I take care of my appearance, but that comment hurt. It felt like he was reducing me to how I look.
For context, this man is very close friends with my manager. Before I even started working there, another manager apparently told my manager to “protect me” from this older colleague. My manager’s response? That I should just accept it and “become harder.”
This same colleague regularly makes racist jokes. We have two colleagues with darker skin tones, and once he told someone to get two black coffees “for the blacks.” By the way, I am one of the few people that isn't white. He’s also made multiple child 🌽 jokes at least four times since I’ve been there.
Almost every day, he comments on how I should talk more. He once called me the “office bitch” because I’m direct and sometimes dry. He said I don’t belong at their table island because I’m not much of a talker. He says these things with a straight face. Everyone else either laughs or ignores it, especially my manager.
He makes sexual jokes at least a couple of times a week. For example, when a colleague mentioned getting a gift for his girlfriend, this older man said, “What are you expecting in return? A blowjob?” Everyone laughed except the guy he said it to.
There have been at least 10 worse sexual jokes since I started. My manager does absolutely nothing.
Another example: Some colleagues don’t work Fridays. On Thursdays they say, “Have a nice weekend!” because they won’t be in the next day. My manager and this older colleague actually filed a complaint to the CEO because they didn’t like hearing “have a nice weekend” while they still had one more workday left. They are both close friends with the CEO, so no one dares to challenge them.
Over time, I’ve started becoming more social at work because I’m finally feeling more comfortable, with everyone except the people sitting directly with me. I laugh more, talk more, and socialize more. But I’m still objectively quieter than most people in the office. People there talk constantly, so much that it’s hard to concentrate.
Now here’s the part that really confused me.
My manager confronted me and said that a colleague told him I’m not doing any work. He said I talk too much and walk around too much to other colleagues’ desks. Yes, I sometimes walk over to talk to people, but it’s literally a 5-second walk. And other colleagues talk WAY more than I do. This hurt me alot. This is my first job and I already struggle with not being good or smart enough.
There’s another employee he manages who talks all day, brings people from other departments to his desk, and chats for an hour. My manager never says anything to him.
But with me, he said he should be able to trust me, and that that trust is “going away.” He told me to talk less and spend less time socializing.
I feel like I can’t win. When I was quiet, I was criticized for being too quiet. Now that I talk more, I’m accused of not working.
I feel extremely uncomfortable at work. I brace myself every day for new comments. The worst part is I’ve never directly said that I don’t like the comments. I just try to respond normally. So now I feel like if I suddenly speak up, they’ll say, “Why didn’t you say something before?”
My manager is… nice most of the time? But extremely dry and honestly not a good manager. He doesn’t check on my progress, doesn’t make schedules, doesn’t plan. I constantly have to take initiative. I spoke to another manager about this, and even he admitted my manager isn’t great at actually managing. He only tells me when I’ve done something wrong. Never what I’ve done well.
It’s gotten to the point where I dread work. I feel sick to my stomach. I cry sometimes because I hate being there. I’m stressed constantly and honestly feel like I’m heading toward burnout, and I’m only 24 at my first job.
There are so many more things that have happened, but this is already long enough.
My contract ends in two months and I don’t plan to stay. Honestly, I want to resign before that. I still live with my parents, so financially I won’t be homeless, but I would have no income. I feel guilty for wanting to leave, but I also feel like I’m heading toward burnout at 24 in my very first job. I am actually planning on resigning as soon as possible. I had to work today, but I called in sick because mentally I feel tired and I feel sick to my stomach.
If every office job is like this, I genuinely don’t know if I can handle corporate life.
Is this normal? Or am I in a toxic environment? please be honest if I am too soft.
Jobadvisor
I want to be very direct with you: This is not normal, and you are not "too soft."
You aren't experiencing "corporate life"; you are experiencing a toxic, hostile work environment that borders on—and likely crosses into—legal harassment and discrimination.
What you’re feeling (the dread, the physical sickness, the crying) is a natural response to a psychological "double bind." You were harassed for being quiet, then disciplined for being social. This is a classic tactic used in dysfunctional workplaces to keep an employee off-balance and compliant.
Breaking Down the Environment
To help you gain some perspective and shed the guilt, let's look at the facts of your situation:
Harassment: Jokes about "child 🌽," sexual favors, and comments about your body/appearance are not "edgy" office humor. In most modern corporations, these are fireable offenses on the first or second strike.
Discrimination: Making "black coffee" jokes directed at coworkers of color is textbook racial harassment. Statistics from the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) show that in 2023 alone, there were over 29,000 charges filed related to race discrimination and over 27,000 related to sex-based harassment in the US. You are part of a significant percentage of the workforce facing documented, illegal behavior.
The "Buddy" System: Your manager is friends with the harasser and the CEO. This is why the "rules" only apply to you. When a manager tells you to "become harder" in response to harassment, they are failing their most basic legal and professional duty to provide a safe work environment.
Gaslighting: Telling you that "trust is going away" because you socialized for five seconds—while others talk for an hour—is a way to make you doubt your own competence and reality.
Is every office like this?
Absolutely not. While every job has some level of "office politics," the vast majority of professional environments have:
HR Departments that would be terrified of the liability this man is creating.
Professional Standards where sexual comments are considered taboo and career-ending.
Basic Decency where coworkers don't file CEO-level complaints over someone saying "Have a nice weekend."
Your Next Steps
Since you live with your parents and have a safety net, you are in a position of power that many people don't have. You do not owe this company your mental health.
Don't "Become Harder": You shouldn't have to build armor to survive a place that should be professional. That "armor" eventually turns into burnout and bitterness.
The Two-Month Mark: If you can't stomach the final two months, leave. If you decide to stay to finish the contract, do "Quiet Quitting"—do exactly what is in your job description, stop trying to win their approval, and spend your mental energy applying for your next role.
Document Everything: Even if you don't sue, write down dates, times, and quotes of the sexual and racist remarks. It validates your experience and protects you if they try to claim you were fired for "performance" reasons later.
Exit Interview: If you feel safe doing so when you leave, tell HR or a different manager exactly why you are going. Mention the specific jokes. If the CEO is friends with the harasser, it may not change things there, but it keeps your record clear that they were the problem, not your work ethic.
You are 24. You have 40+ years of career ahead of you. Do not let one group of unprofessional, stagnant men convince you that work has to feel like a prison sentence.