Boss calls me for unpaid help “as a friend”, after laying me off at Christmas… Sorry, but NOPE!
In December, I was laid off from a small family business. I’d been there four years. Mr. Boss hoped to hire me back “when business picks up”. Maybe.
I told him it was cool to reach out to me, but was clear I wouldn’t be waiting around.
I started a new job this week. It’s going incredibly well.
I’ve also gotten three very long panicked voicemails from Mr. Boss this week…
The only other employee, (his wife) left him and the business. She didn’t train him on how to do our jobs. She just packed up her shit and left. She won’t answer his calls.
Not sure how this is my problem…
Now he expects me to come in and train him “As a favor to a friend”. Not being rehired, totally unpaid and out of the goodness of my heart.
Nope! He laid me off two weeks before Christmas!
Also… He’d love me to come in Saturday or Sunday, because that “works for him”.
NOPE… I don’t care what works for him, because I don’t work for him anymore!
We aren’t “friends” and it’s NOT my problem. The audacity is audaciting! It astounds me that a business owner would think this is an okay thing to do.
Jobadvisor
The audacity isn’t just "audaciting"—it’s reached a level of entitlement that deserves its own scientific classification.
First off, congratulations on the new job! Starting a new role and having it go "incredibly well" is the best kind of revenge. It’s the ultimate "living well is the best revenge" scenario.
To be clear, you are 100% in the right here. There is a massive, burning bridge between "former employer" and "favor-granting friend," and he burned it when he handed you a pink slip two weeks before the holidays.
The Reality Check
It’s fascinating how business owners suddenly pivot to the "we're family/friends" narrative the moment they need free labor, yet somehow it’s "just business" when they’re cutting your livelihood before Christmas. Here is why his request is particularly egregious:
The "Friend" Card: Real friends don't ask friends to work for free to save a for-profit business. That’s not a favor; that’s exploitation.
The Training Gap: The fact that he didn’t know how to run his own business operations or ensure his wife trained him is a management failure, not your emergency.
The Timing: Expecting you to spend your first weekend off from a new job solving his problems is actually a risk to your current success. You need that time to recharge for the job that actually pays you.
How to Handle the "Panicked Voicemails"
Since he’s clearly spiraling, you have three solid options depending on how much energy you want to expend:
| Option | Approach | Best If... |
| The Hard Ghost | Block the number or continue to ignore. | You want zero drama and never plan on speaking to him again. |
| The Professional Boundary | "I’ve started a new role and my schedule is full. I'm unable to assist." | You want to be polite but firm and shut down the "friend" talk. |
| The Consultant Pivot | "I can't do favors, but my weekend consulting rate is $XXX/hr (3hr minimum)." | You’re feeling spicy and want to see how fast he hangs up. |
Pro-tip: If you do decide to respond, do it via text or email. Do not get on the phone with him. He will try to use "friendship" and "panic" to guilt-trip you in real-time. Keep it in writing where his "audacity" is forced to be concise.
Final Verdict
You owe him nothing. Not a Saturday, not a Sunday, and certainly not the "goodness of your heart." He treated you like a line item on a spreadsheet in December; you are simply returning the favor by treating him like a stranger in February.
Can I resign by telling HR instead of my manager?
I work a remote gig job, and have only had one gig. My manager has only attempted to contact me once, and I missed her phone call. Since then, I have texted her and emailed her multiple times regarding my in-person training, and have received no response. I even called her, left a voicemail, and responded to her automated text system. Still, no response. The only way I even knew that she was aware that I existed, was when she scheduled a shift for me. An issue popped up while I was finishing my shift, and I was unable to confirm through the proper channels (an app) that I completed the work. I took photos of my work and the signature of the client confirming that I did the work and emailed it to my manager explaining the situation. That was on Monday, and I still haven't heard back from her. I also have not gotten paid for the three hours of work I've done.
At this point, I don't care about being paid, I just want out. I've already told the client that I would not be returning and they were very understanding, and even said they were used to it. As my manager has given me no evidence that she has even seen my attempts to contact her, I do not want to tell her that I am quitting. I could just never accept another gig from them and delete the app, but I want someone at this company to know about the lack of responses from my manager. From what the client said to me when I told them I was quitting, I assume that many past employees have had similar issues.
I'm new to the job market, and don't know what to do in this case. My dad agreed with me when I brought up telling HR, but he also told me that I'd get a job by walking into workplaces with my resume and introducing myself, so I'm aware that his advice is a bit old fashioned. Would my quitting count if I told HR? Or should I just send off an email that I know if going to get ignored?
Jobadvisor
Welcome to the modern workforce! It sounds like you’ve had a "trial by fire" introduction to the gig economy.
To answer your main question: Yes, you absolutely can resign by contacting HR. In fact, in your specific situation, it is probably the most professional and effective way to handle it.
Here is the breakdown of why your plan is solid and how to execute it.
1. Why HR is the right move here
In a standard corporate environment, you usually tell your manager first out of courtesy. However, courtesy is a two-way street. Since your manager has essentially "ghosted" you, HR is your best point of contact for several reasons:
Official Record: HR is responsible for personnel files. Telling them ensures your resignation is documented, even if your manager never opens her inbox.
The Pay Issue: You mentioned you don't care about the pay, but you should. Legally, you worked those hours and are entitled to compensation. HR is the department that actually handles payroll disputes.
Accountability: You want the company to know about the lack of communication. HR needs to know if a manager is failing to onboard or communicate with gig workers, as this costs the company money and talent.
2. Is your Dad's advice "Old Fashioned"?
Your instinct is right. While "walking in with a resume" is definitely a relic of the 90s, your dad’s advice to contact a human at the company is still very relevant. In this case, HR is that human connection.
3. How to write the "Ghosted" Resignation
Since you want to ensure they know why you are leaving, keep your email professional but direct. Don't be afraid to name names.
Subject: Resignation - [Your Name] - [Employee ID if applicable]
Dear HR Team,
Please accept this email as formal notification that I am resigning from my position as [Job Title], effective immediately.
I am taking this step because I have been unable to establish a reliable line of communication with my manager, [Manager's Name]. Despite multiple attempts to contact her via phone, text, and email regarding training and shift completion, I have received no response.
Additionally, I have not yet been compensated for my shift on [Date]. I have attached the proof of work and client signature to this email for your records. I would appreciate it if you could ensure this outstanding balance is settled.
Thank you for your assistance.
Best regards,
[Your Name]
[Your Phone Number]
Important Considerations
Don't just delete the app: Even in gig work, "job abandonment" (just disappearing) can sometimes lead to you being marked as "ineligible for rehire" in a system that other companies might use. Sending that one email protects your reputation.
The Pay: Even for three hours, don't let them keep your money. It’s the principle. If HR sees that you have photos and a client signature, they will usually process the payment quickly to avoid any legal headaches.