By our fifth wedding anniversary, my husband and I had already relocated twice for his career. We were in our twenties, eager for opportunity, and unburdened by many responsibilities. At that stage of life, moving felt less like upheaval and more like momentum. Change was invigorating, and starting over seemed simple.
When a third relocation opportunity arose, however, the decision carried more weight. Our family had grown; we now had a baby to consider. The move would take us from Houston to California, a place we had only briefly visited. It was undeniably exciting, but it also prompted questions we had never needed to ask before. What would it really mean to move halfway across the country with a child?
Parenthood reframed our decision-making
As we weighed the decision, we asked ourselves a telling question: what advice would we give our child if she were an adult facing the same choice? We realized we would encourage her to take the risk. Once that became clear, our path forward did as well.
My husband’s employer arranged a moving company to manage the logistics, but even with professional support, the transition was far from seamless. The moving truck suffered a blowout on I-10, delaying the delivery of our belongings. When we arrived in California, we were without many of the everyday items that make caring for a baby easier. The disruption added stress to an already demanding transition.
Despite a difficult start, we adjusted. We took advantage of California’s natural beauty—mountains, beaches, and a lifestyle that encouraged exploration. What proved harder to reconcile was the cost of living. For our family to remain there long-term, I would need to return to work. Complicating that plan was the fact that I was pregnant.
As our family continued to grow, the financial realities became impossible to ignore. We were unsure whether California was sustainable for us, but we were certain there was somewhere that was.
When circumstances change, priorities often do as well
Two and a half years after arriving in California, we relocated once again—this time back to Houston. Once more, my husband’s company provided relocation assistance, easing the transition.
Moving while pregnant and caring for a three-year-old was exhausting, but we eventually settled into our new home and routine. When we reached the milestone of living there for two and a half years, it felt significant—evidence that we had finally paused after years of motion.
Not long after, another opportunity emerged. My husband was encouraged to consider applying for a position outside the United States. Even applying would signal that we were open to moving abroad. This time, the question was no longer about whether we could manage another move. It was about whether we should.
Instead of asking what advice we might give our children someday, we asked ourselves a different question: what kind of life did we want to give them now?
Choosing stability over perpetual movement
While living abroad offered cultural enrichment and professional growth, we ultimately decided that stability mattered more. We wanted our children to have consistency, community, and a sense of place. Rather than building a life defined by constant relocation, we chose to pursue adventure through travel during school breaks and family vacations.
My husband chose not to apply for the overseas position and declined to pursue roles that would require us to move again. We have now lived in our second Houston home for sixteen years. Moving brought excitement and opportunity for a meaningful chapter of our lives, but we are equally grateful that we recognized when that chapter had run its course.
If our children ever ask us for advice about relocating, I believe we would offer the same guidance we once gave ourselves: take the chance—while also understanding when it is time to put down roots.