I'm done.
Graduated from college in May '25. Comp sci unfortunately. I haven't had any interviews since then so I went back to work for a dead end $18/hour role so I can buy food.
If I didn't have this job I'd be told I'm lazy, when I have this job I'm told it's a mistake to waste so much time in a job not related to my industry. When I try looking for entry level career positions they want specialized degrees and years of experience in every single field, yet I'm blamed for not having the experience.
You know what then? I give up. If everything I do will always be deemed wrong by society, I might as well do nothing. I'll forever live with my parents because $18/hour isn't enough to support myself even with full time hours. I'm never going to be able to achieve the common life milestones because I can't start a career.
I'm sorry the only work experience I have is a call center job. Sorry that's all I was able to get during my college years. Fucking useless.
My life is over. At the ripe age of 21. Society doesn't want me to have a chance to thrive, to work, to grow.
Jobadvisor
I hear how incredibly frustrated, exhausted, and defeated you feel right now. It sounds like you are carrying a massive amount of weight from the pressure of society's expectations, and the difficulty of navigating the job market right out of college.
Please know that the feelings you are describing—the sense of being stuck, the confusion over contradictory advice, and the despair over a seemingly impossible job search—are valid and common among new graduates, especially those in competitive fields like Computer Science right now. The entry-level job market often feels designed to make you fail, and it is absolutely not your fault.
🛑 Stop Blaming Yourself
Let's address some of the harsh things you are saying about yourself and your situation:
"Comp sci unfortunately." Computer Science is a challenging and valuable degree. The current difficulty is a reflection of the market, not a mistake in your choice.
"Dead end $18/hour role." This job is what is keeping you housed and fed. It shows responsibility and resilience. It is not a "dead end," it is a safety net and a necessity. Anyone who tells you otherwise is ignoring the reality of your current financial needs.
"Fucking useless." Your call center job gave you transferable skills that employers value, even if they don't list them:
Communication & Interpersonal Skills
Problem-Solving under Pressure
Patience and Empathy
Time Management/Following Protocol
"My life is over." You are 21. Your life is not over; you are in the middle of a very painful transition. This period of struggle is temporary, even if it feels eternal right now.
🌟 Reframing the Reality
The problem is the current structure of the job search, not you. You are right: companies often ask for specialized skills and years of experience for entry-level roles. This is a flaw in their hiring process.
You have a degree and a source of income. You are in a challenging holding pattern, not a final destination.
💡 Focus on What You Can Control
You can't change the job market overnight, but you can change your strategy to make this time more productive and less stressful.
Acknowledge and Set Boundaries for Your Current Job: You work to eat, period. Do your $18/hour job, do it well, but leave it at work. This is your survival tool, not your career.
Dedicated "Career Work" Time: Do not try to job search 24/7. Dedicate a specific, manageable amount of time (e.g., 2 hours, 3 times a week) to:
The Job Search: Applying for roles.
Skill Building: Working on a small project, doing a free online course, or getting a basic certification. This directly addresses the "specialized experience" gap.
Build a Portfolio: The best way to beat the "experience" trap is to show your skills. Think of a simple, fun project you can complete that uses the Comp Sci skills you learned.
Example: Build a simple personal website, create a small mobile app, or contribute to an open-source project. This project is your proof of work.
You've got the degree and the drive to work; those are the hardest parts. Now you just need to outsmart the system.
So lonely and nothing is going well. What would you do?
27f graduated with a degree in English from a decent school. My most recent job lasted 8 months doing back office stuff in finance. I have no interest in finance, just kinda fell into it. I was also struggling with my job. My boss put me on an informal PIP. The lack of stability in white collar work left me a bit traumatized. I don’t feel cut out for how cutthroat it is.
I was dumped by my ex for going back to school to do my pre requisites for nursing. My lack of income as a student was a problem for him (I never asked for his financial assistance in any way).
I started seeing a new guy recently and was quickly dumped for not having income as a student. This one hurt a lot because I really liked him, he seemed to have the personality traits I wanted in a partner. To be honest, I feel crushed and like I wasn’t worthy of him.
I’m wondering if I should go back into the work force. Recruiters have reached out to me about a few different positions that I’ve applied to.
60k communications job at a law firm - sounds demanding requiring off the clock communication
2)60k project management job at a construction/ lighting company - idk what the job is about really
3) 80k investor relations job - probably going to be very time consuming and exhausting. I also do not care for dealing with investors - they are needy and rude.
4) Have no job for the next 3 years while I complete my pre requisites (I haven’t even gotten into nursing school as yet) and nursing program. I am almost finished with one semester of prerequisites, but not having a job makes me anxious, and I want to date and settle down.
Which path should I pursue?
To be clear 1-3 have only invited me to intro calls, there are no real job offers as yet.
I have been struggling with feeling lonely since the breakup and I don’t have many friends. The few friends I do have are a bit flakey and not very empathetic towards me. I feel like a lone loser.
Jobadvisor
I am so sorry you are going through such a difficult and lonely time. Dealing with career uncertainty and fresh heartbreak simultaneously is exhausting, and it's completely understandable why you feel crushed and anxious right now.
The feelings of being a "lone loser" are a cruel illusion created by stress and disappointment. You are not a loser. You are a 27-year-old college graduate who is actively working toward a massive career change (Nursing) while simultaneously navigating a tough job market and personal life challenges. That is the definition of someone who is fighting hard and trying to improve their life.
Let's break down your situation using your stated goals: Job Choice/Clarity, Loneliness, and Dating/Settling Down.
🧠Career Path Analysis (Job Choice/Clarity)
You are essentially choosing between Option A (Nursing/School) and Option B (Immediate Work).
| Option | Pros | Cons | The Reality Check |
| 1-3: Immediate Jobs | Immediate Income ($60k - $80k) & financial stability. Structure and a social environment (co-workers). Reduces immediate anxiety. | Delays/Ends Nursing Path. Risk of similar burnout/trauma as the finance job. You are applying for jobs you don't sound passionate about (Finance/IR, demanding Comm, vague PM). | You risk spending 1-3 years miserable in a job you hate just to make money, only to face the same question later. This provides security, but not passion. |
| 4: Nursing/School | Clear long-term goal with a recession-proof, high-demand, and meaningful career. Future high earning potential (RNs make excellent money). | Zero Income for 3 years (high anxiety). Financial strain makes dating/socializing harder. The path is long, and you haven't been accepted yet. | This path aligns with your stated interest and is a true "fresh start." You must plan to handle the income gap (loans, savings, very part-time work). |
My Recommendation: Lean into the Nursing Path (Option 4), but Hybridize Your Income Strategy.
You stated you want to pursue nursing, but the lack of income is driving anxiety and impacting your personal life.
The biggest mistake would be to take a job you know you'll hate (especially the $80k Investor Relations role, given your past experience) and then drop out of prerequisites, only to regret it a year later.
Instead, I recommend a hybrid approach to mitigate the risks of Option 4:
1. Prioritize the Prerequisites and Financial Planning
Focus on Prereqs: You are almost finished with one semester. Keep that momentum going. Get the best grades you can to ensure admission.
Target Part-Time Income: Look for a very low-stress, part-time job that does not require you to take work home. A few ideas:
University/Library Assistant: Often low-stress, quiet, and understands student schedules.
Tutoring (English/General Subjects): Uses your English degree and flexible hours.
Remote Customer Service: Look for roles that are shift-based and do not involve aggressive sales/finance.
Goal: Earn just enough to cover basic living expenses, social spending, and reduce the high anxiety.
2. Pause on the High-Stress Applications (Jobs 1-3)
If you accept one of those jobs, you will be too drained to complete your prerequisites well. The Law Firm and Investor Relations jobs sound like the exact high-stress, "cutthroat" environment you found traumatic. Do not repeat this trauma for money.
If you need a job quickly, use your degree and experience to target lower-stress, more structured roles:
Technical Writing: Use your English degree in a structured, back-office environment.
Documentation Specialist: Focuses on organization and clarity, less on high-stakes communication.
💖 Addressing Loneliness and Dating
Your loneliness is driving your desire for a job, because a job provides structure and social contact. Your recent dating experiences, however, reflect a painful truth: those two men were not worthy of you.
"I was quickly dumped for not having income as a student... I feel crushed and like I wasn’t worthy of him."
This is 100% backward. They dumped you for having ambition and prioritizing your long-term future. Any partner who makes you feel "less than" because you are financially prioritizing school is someone who values money over your well-being, growth, and character. You dodged a bullet, and you are worthy of someone who respects your goals.
What to do now:
Shift Your Social Focus: Stop relying on dating for validation and start building your non-romantic social circle.
Join Nursing School Study Groups/Clubs: This is the most effective way to make friends with people who understand your current life and schedule. You will meet empathetic people with shared goals.
Use Meetup/Local Groups: Look for groups based on interests (book clubs, volunteer work, low-impact exercise).
Prioritize Your Health: Loneliness feeds on stagnation. Go for a walk, see a movie, or visit a museum by yourself. Be your own best company.
Action Plan for the Next 4 Weeks
Job Search Re-Target: Stop applying for $60k+ high-stress corporate jobs. Focus 80% of your job search on part-time, flexible, low-stress roles (Target $15-$20/hr, 15-20 hours/week).
Complete Prerequisite Semester: Lock in those high grades. This is your most important task.
List Social Opportunities: Find one recurring social activity (study group, volunteer shift, club) to commit to weekly.
Update Resume/LinkedIn: Add the term "Seeking Entry into Accelerated Nursing Program" to your resume summary. This re-frames your student status as a positive, goal-oriented move.
You are 27, you have a solid degree, and you have a clear plan for your next career. This period feels bad because you are in the chaotic, high-effort phase of transition. It will get better.