How would you deal with a senior coworker randomly calling you for "meetings" at the end of the day (right before you usually log off)? Reminding him I leave that time hasn't worked so far and he doesn't listen
I have had issues with a senior coworker (different team, doesn't usually do dev work) but we've been working on a project together calling me every day right before I usually log off. The meetings last 1-2 hours and go in circles. I've repeatedly told him I log off every day at 4:30 and would prefer any unscheduled meetings happen earlier, but he calls me at 4:15 or later all the time. He says its fine because he works until 6 pm. This has happened multiple days per week over the past 2 months. The meetings are never scheduled. He just calls me and expects me to answer right when I'm about to get off work, then brings up our meetings in the daily scrum each morning as his accomplishment for the day.
I've tried coming up with excuses of why he should let me leave on time (need to get to grocery store or pharmacy, they close at 5) but he still doesn't get it. I've also brought the issue up to my manager who didn't care. The senior just likes to call me randomly to get long updates from me on exactly where I'm at on this project. So far he hasn't even set up his environment for it yet and I've done all the dev work on it, which is fine I guess if I at least had a work life balance.
We got off early for 4th of July and he called me 10 mins before the entire team left saying the higher ups asked him for a list of all the reasons the project is getting delayed. He kept me almost an hour overtime when the rest of the dev team left early because he said he has work to do the rest of the day. Apparently the director is wanting to know why its taken me 2 months so far when I have taken over the responsibilities of their senior software architect who quit, with no backup and no one to go to for help since coworker still hasn't even set up his environment. Instead he is bouncing between other projects for his team and just calls me expecting me to stay overtime and give him long updates of where I'm at.
I can't be rude because he's a senior team lead on another dept and this is my 1st year on the job but this is getting toxic. How do I draw a line so I'm not staying overtime multiple days a week for 1-2 hours per day? He's not taking the hint and expects me to work later whenever he decides to call me even though I don't get paid overtime and also have a life outside of my working hours.
Jobadvisor
Excellent that you wrote this all out clearly. First: you are not being unreasonable at all. He’s being disrespectful and is either oblivious or (more likely) simply doesn’t care about your time because it’s convenient for him to use you as his note-taker / scapegoat.
Because you have tried polite reminders and even raised it to your manager with no effect, you’re at the point where you need clearer and firmer boundaries.
Below is a direct approach that preserves professionalism (so you don’t appear “rude”) but draws an unambiguous line.
1️⃣ Decide your policy ahead of time
Pick your stop time (you said 4:30). Commit to actually logging off then. No matter who calls.
Unless your role explicitly requires you to be on-call after hours (which it doesn't sound like it does), you're not obliged to be available.
2️⃣ Notify him once more in writing
Send an email or chat message before the next expected call, ideally early in the day. Keep it short and neutral. Example:
“Hi [Name], just a heads up: I’m only available for meetings until 4:30 each day. I’ll need any discussions about the project to happen before then. If you want to set up a recurring meeting, let me know what times work for you before 4:30.”
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It’s polite.
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It’s written, so there’s a record.
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It doesn’t leave the door open for “emergency” calls at 4:15.
3️⃣ Enforce the boundary
When he calls after 4:30 (or at 4:15), do not answer. If you must answer for political reasons (though I strongly suggest you don’t), say immediately:
“I only have 10 minutes before I log off. Let’s plan to continue tomorrow before 4:30.”
Then stop the call at 4:30.
If you want even less stress, just don’t pick up after 4:30. Let it go to voicemail or miss the call.
4️⃣ (Optional) Use your calendar
If you have an online calendar your team can see, block out 4:30+ as “Offline – End of Day.” That way he can't claim ignorance.
5️⃣ For the daily scrum
If he’s grandstanding there by saying “I talked to [you] yesterday about progress,” you can calmly clarify:
“Yes, but I want to reiterate that I’m available for meetings only before 4:30 so I can keep focused time for development and avoid after-hours overrun.”
If you don’t want to confront in the meeting, don’t – but at minimum just stop answering after hours.
6️⃣ If you get pushback
If he complains (“But I work until 6!”) say calmly:
“Understood – but my day ends at 4:30. Let’s schedule time before then.”
If he tries to escalate (“Director wants this!”):
“I’m happy to share status updates in the morning or at any time before 4:30.”
You don’t owe more explanation than that.
7️⃣ If your manager truly won’t help
If you’ve raised it to your manager and they won’t act, you can either:
✅ Keep them in the loop each time it happens (“Just a heads-up – [Name] called again at 4:45; I reminded him I’m not available then.”)
✅ Or stop bringing it up and just enforce the boundary yourself.
Sometimes managers don’t want to get involved but will stop blaming you if they see you’re consistent and have given clear, documented heads-up.
8️⃣ A possible script
If you want a single thing you can literally copy/paste to him:
Hi [Name], I just want to confirm that my availability for meetings ends at 4:30 each day. I won’t be able to take calls about the project after that time. Let’s plan any discussions before then so I can help effectively.
9️⃣ On being “rude”
Setting a boundary is not rude.
Being passive-aggressive or ghosting without warning can be rude.
But if you’ve given clear notice, then simply not answering is normal and professional.
In short
✅ Tell him clearly in writing one more time.
✅ Stop answering after 4:30.
✅ Don’t apologize for having work hours.
✅ Repeat as needed.
If you want, I can also help you:
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Draft the message you’ll send him
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Draft an escalation email to your manager
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Role-play a conversation to practice saying no
Just let me know!