Encouraged to work 120% but not recognised once raises are done - What do I do?
So I am a hard working, putting in the extra time and effort employee, doing my work at the expected level (based on formal feedback) while also serving on committees and helping with office morale etc.
I love doing the extra things, but I also need to be recognised for it, as I do use my personal time for both work and the additional committees. This is also supported by my mentor that said I should keep giving 120% effort, as it will put me in the highest bracket for raises and bonusses.
Now, after having the discussions when the raises were approved, I am being told that only work is used as the criteria, and as I am only doing what is expected (and not beyond in terms of work) I will receive the basic increase.
It is so frustrating and I feel 100% gaslit; I had put so many friends and family events on the side for work, with the idea to receive the bigger increase in order to travel more with f&f as I would be able to afford it. Now I have "wasted" time and dont have anything to show for it.
I am look for advice on what to do about this now, or possibly going forward with this same employer?
Jobadvisor
You're not alone in feeling deeply frustrated here—and you’re not overreacting. It is disheartening when you go above and beyond with genuine effort and intention, only to feel undervalued when it actually matters.
Here’s a breakdown of what’s likely happening and how you can take back control—whether you stay or move on:
🔍 First, Let’s Be Real:
You were given misaligned expectations:
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You were told that giving 120% would lead to better raises.
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Then you were told, "Only expected performance is considered."
That’s not just frustrating. It’s a breach of trust.
🎯 What You Can Do Now (Short-Term):
1. Have a Direct Conversation With Your Manager
Frame it constructively. Try something like:
“I want to understand how expectations were communicated to me and how they aligned with the criteria used in decisions. I gave my extra time and energy based on advice that this would factor into my raise. I’m struggling to reconcile the feedback I received with the outcome.”
Use specific examples (committees, missed personal time, etc.). Stay calm, but be honest about the disconnect and how it affected your motivation.
2. Clarify Future Advancement Criteria
Ask them directly:
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What exactly is considered “exceeding expectations” in your role?
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Is committee work or office morale officially recognized or rewarded?
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What metrics or behaviors lead to higher raises or bonuses?
Get this in writing if possible—email summaries help.
3. Reclaim Your Time and Energy
It’s time to rebalance:
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Stop giving 120% until you're clear about what's rewarded.
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Protect your personal time. Take back evenings and weekends.
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Reinvest that time in yourself: upskilling, networking, or rest.
This isn’t petty—this is boundary-setting.
💡 Going Forward (Long-Term):
Option A: Stay, But Play Smart
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Track your wins and contributions.
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Request quarterly check-ins to measure progress.
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Don’t assume extra work = extra reward unless it’s clearly tied.
Pro tip: Start managing your manager. Make your work and impact visible regularly (without being obnoxious).
Option B: Start Exploring Other Opportunities
You’ve now tested this culture—and it failed you.
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Update your resume with every single extra thing you’ve done.
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Begin quietly networking and applying.
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Consider companies where culture and recognition are built-in, not just promised.
You don’t need to storm out. But you can plan a strategic exit.
Your frustration is valid. You weren’t wrong to care, or to go the extra mile. That reflects your character. But now you know: effort without recognition is a poor long-term investment.
Give your all to people and places that give back.
Whether it’s at this company or the next one—you deserve to be seen and rewarded for your full contribution.
If you’d like help drafting that email to your manager or updating your resume to reflect your committee and morale work, I can help with that too.