Do You Recognize These 12 Stages Of Work Burnout?

 

Work burnout is preventable.

But we have to catch it early before it turns into a vicious cycle.

In a groundbreaking overview, called Burn-Out: The High Cost of High Achievement, psychologists Herbert J. Freudenberger Ph. D and Geraldine Richelson break down the 12 stages of burnout.

Let’s break down each stage.

Stage 1: It feels like you have to constantly prove yourself

It feels like you have to prove your worth.

• By demonstrating it.
• By going over the top.
• By trying to impress others.

But the problem with trying to prove yourself to someone is that instead of doing things to impress yourself, you are reaffirming their doubt that you are not to be trusted.

The more you try to impress others, the more you end up feeling like an imposter.

When a boss asks you for X, you do 10X to try to impress her.

When a colleague asks you to do something you’d normally say no to — you end up agreeing to prove your worth. Before you know it, you have way too much on your plate to handle.

So you do what you know best.

Stage 2: You work harder

You now realize that the 9 to 5 does not have enough hours to get everything your over-achieving brain wants you to get done so you put in more effort trying to really get things done.

• You get more emails
• You get more instructions
• You get asked for more little favors

You end up saying yes to nearly everything.

As more and more things start to pile up, more and more things start to move out of the 9 to 5 pile and into the 5 to 9 pile.

Before you know it, people are complimenting you for working so hard.

Our primal brains likely see this as a reward of tribal acceptance where our survival and food security depended on being part of the tribe.

Just like a dog learning to sit for a treat, we end up seeking more and more of these rewarding behaviors until it gets slightly out of hand.

Stage 3: You start to ignore your needs

Your work comes first; your needs second.

You get so into this cycle of work and reward-seeking that you now start to forget about some of your basic needs including:

• Eating
• Sleeping
• Showering
• Using the restroom

In some cases, it gets so bad that you catch yourself forgetting to breathe properly because you are focused on this never-ending doubt-driven goal.

You end up pulling all-nighters. You end up wearing the same clothes. You forget about hydrating yourself.

You just need to get done with this everlasting pile of work and then you will have time for exercise or meditation — meanwhile, this is probably where we need it most.

Stage 4: You displace your conflicts

Your conflict is directed at the wrong person.

Instead of accurately guiding your conflicts to their sources and sorting out this mess you’ve put yourself into, you misdirect your conflict, likely to the ones closest to you.

This happens with:

• Internal conflict — when you are frustrated with the situation.
• External conflict — when people around you are causing frustration.

You now start to feel a sense of exasperation towards people in your life, even though they probably don’t have much to do with the conflict that upset you in the first place.

This might cause you to overreact to the smallest of things.

Stage 5: You start changing your values

Now you are starting to accept that this is a part of you.

Your work gets priority above:

• Interests
• Loved ones
• Your hobbies
• Moral compass

Your values start to change little by little.

At first, you might start to accept there is no time for trivial things like playing golf or playing the clarinet after work.

But then it becomes worse.

Your core values as a partner, parent, sibling, or friend might start to fade and you probably don’t even realize it.

Stage 6: You start denying problems that come up

Now that your values have changed, little problems start to come up.

Emotionally intelligent people in your life have to remind you to make other things a priority, too. But you will likely brush it off like there is nothing wrong with your new value system.

You probably think these people are demanding.

Soon you start blaming your actions on work pressure or the fact that there is not enough time in your life to do everything that has to be done.

Stage 7: You start withdrawing from your social and family life

Work becomes so overwhelming that you disappear.

• Likely from social life.
• Likely from social media.

You start to seclude yourself from people you love.

When they talk to you, you start to internalize nearly everything you’re (really) feeling. You likely pretend that everything is fine.

When someone asks you, “How was your day?” you probably say “Fine. Just super busy.” meanwhile, it feels like you are nearing a breaking point.

Sometimes this stage can get so bad that many people here try to escape to drugs, alcohol, comfort food, binge-watching, and guilty pleasures — all to enhance their current reality.

Stage 8: Your behaviors change and it hurts loved ones

Your behavior starts to drastically change.

You do weird things that you wouldn’t normally do.

You color your hair pink to look for attention or go on a crazy shopping spree for items to impress others, and perhaps forget to pick up your child from school or turn up late for meetings.

This is where most people around you start to notice that something’s up. The people closest to you are likely to be hurt saying that you’ve changed.

Stage 9: You start to feel depersonalized and worthless

Because you’re moving so far away from your typical values, you start to feel depersonalized, almost like you’ve lost your real identity.

The imposter syndrome starts to get really bad.

You don’t see yourself or others as valuable anymore.

This leads you to totally forget about your needs.

You’re getting seriously tired of ant mode.

Emotions of worthlessness build to an all-time high.

Stage 10: You feel really empty and numb

Zombie mode.

You’re doing things but you don’t feel anything.

• Time becomes a blur.
• Work becomes a blur.
• Life becomes a blur.

It’s like your body has reached its pain threshold and it is trying to protect you from threats seemingly coming out of every corner.

Stage 11: You feel depressed and exhausted

You are exhausted.

You used to see the brightest colors in your head.

But now everything that used to be colorful now seems bleak.

It feels like someone through your life into Photoshop and decided to pull the saturation and brightness sliders all the way to the left.

At this stage, things become so much that your brain starts zoning out.

Stage 12: Full burnout: You physically and mentally collapse

You stop seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

Your body’s breaking point is reached.

• Your mind collapses
• Your body collapses

You feel at an all-time low, probably just wanting to cover your face under a warm duvet. It likely feels like this feeling has entered every cell in your body and it hurts from the inside out and from the outside in.

You go into a full nervous breakdown and need urgent medical attention.

Your doctor might refer you to a psychologist for cognitive behavioral therapy. With proper medical treatment, Cleveland Clinic says “your symptoms are likely to go away within six months.”

Do some of these look familiar to you?

They surely did to me.

But today I recognize it is our job as workplace leaders not just to look out for ourselves but to reduce stress on the people working with us.

That means:

• Let’s prioritize happiness.
• Let’s give more paid leave.
• Let’s have less stressful meetings.
• Let’s learn how to criticize before we talk.
• Let’s add mental health benefits for everyone.
• Let’s treat mindfulness not as a privilege but as a need.
• Let’s make it a thing not to send work emails after hours.

Because the work day never stops until we say it stops.