I'm having one of those "am I being played" moments and need some outside perspective cause this situation is lowkey driving me insane
Started at this marketing company right out of college making $45k (thought I was living the dream lmao). Got decent raises over 4 years and now I'm at $62k doing senior-level work, training new people, the whole thing.
Plot twist: Found out through the office gossip chain that the two people I just trained are making $75k and $78k respectively. Like... I literally taught them how to do the job and they're making 20% more than me??? Make it make sense 💀
Confronted my manager about it last week and got the classic "well they had different experience" BS even though one of them came straight from retail and the other was a barista. Meanwhile I've been grinding here for FOUR YEARS building up all our processes and client relationships.
The dilemma:
- Option 1: Demand a raise to match (but what if they say no and now it's awkward?)
- Option 2: Start job hunting but I actually like the work and my coworkers
- Option 3: Accept that I'm apparently terrible at advocating for myself and just... stay bitter I guess?
The thing that's really messing with me is wondering how long this has been happening. Like how many promotions and raises have I just... not gotten because I never pushed hard enough?
My savings account is looking real sad at $3,200 so I can't exactly storm out dramatically, but staying feels like I'm just accepting being undervalued forever
Has anyone successfully unfucked a situation like this? Or should I just take the L and find somewhere that actually pays people fairly from the start?
Jobadvisor
This is a frustrating situation, and it's completely understandable why you're feeling undervalued and "played." You're not alone in experiencing this – it's a very common issue where existing employees, especially those who don't frequently change jobs, can lag behind new hires in terms of salary.
Let's break down your options and add some perspective:
Understanding the "New Hire Premium"
Your manager's excuse about "different experience" is likely a smokescreen. The reality is that companies often offer higher salaries to new hires to attract talent in a competitive market. They're trying to fill a role quickly and are willing to pay market rate for new talent, even if that talent is less experienced than their current, loyal employees. This is a flaw in many compensation structures, not a reflection of your worth. You are absolutely not "bad at negotiating" in the sense that you are inherently flawed; rather, you may not have been aware of the current market value for your skills and experience, and the company is capitalizing on that.
Analyzing Your Options:
Option 1: Demand a raise to match (but what if they say no and now it's awkward?)
- Pros: This is the most direct way to get what you deserve without leaving. If successful, you stay in a job you like with people you like, but at a fair wage.
- Cons: There's a risk they say no, and it could create tension. However, the tension is already there for you, so confronting it might be a relief. The "awkwardness" is on their side for paying you unfairly, not on yours for asking for what you're worth.
- How to approach it:
- Do your research: Gather concrete data on market rates for senior marketing roles in your area and industry. Look at sites like Glassdoor, LinkedIn, Salary.com, and industry-specific salary surveys.
- Quantify your value: Prepare a list of your accomplishments, particularly those where you've built processes, improved client relationships, or trained new hires (demonstrating your senior-level contributions). Frame these in terms of their benefit to the company (e.g., "streamlined X process, saving Y hours/dollars," "secured Z new clients," "onboarded and trained A new team members to full productivity").
- Present your case professionally: Schedule a dedicated meeting with your manager and come prepared. State clearly that you've become aware of a significant discrepancy in pay for similar (or less experienced) roles, and based on your contributions and market value, you expect your salary to be adjusted to a specific figure (e.g., $75k-$78k or even slightly higher if your research supports it).
- Be prepared for counter-arguments: They might reiterate the "different experience" line. Counter with your concrete examples of your value and the fact that you've been doing senior-level work and training those very new hires.
- Have a Plan B: If they flat-out refuse or offer a negligible raise, you'll need to decide if you're prepared to walk.
Option 2: Start job hunting but I actually like the work and my coworkers.
- Pros: This is often the most effective way to secure a significant pay bump. New companies are typically willing to pay market rates. It gives you leverage if you get an offer.
- Cons: You might leave a job you otherwise enjoy and good colleagues. The job search process can be time-consuming and stressful. There's no guarantee you'll find a better overall fit, even if the pay is higher.
- How to approach it: Start discreetly. Update your resume and LinkedIn profile. Network with people in your industry. Go on interviews. This doesn't mean you have to leave, but having an offer in hand gives you immense leverage when negotiating with your current employer (or the option to take the new job if your current company doesn't meet your demands).
Option 3: Accept that I'm apparently terrible at advocating for myself and just... stay bitter I guess?
- Pros: None, really.
- Cons: This will lead to resentment, burnout, and likely a decrease in your overall job satisfaction and performance. It's a lose-lose. Your mental health and financial well-being will suffer. Do not choose this option. You are not terrible at advocating for yourself; you're in a situation where the company is taking advantage of your loyalty.
How to "Unfuck" This Situation (Most Likely Path to Success):
The most successful strategy often involves a combination of Option 1 and Option 2:
- Start Job Hunting Discreetly: Even if you like your job, start looking. This isn't about necessarily leaving; it's about understanding your market value and building leverage. The simple act of going through interviews will boost your confidence and clarify what other companies are willing to pay for your skills. You might even discover opportunities that are a better fit overall.
- Gather Your Evidence & Prepare Your Case: While job searching, simultaneously build your case for a raise at your current company. Quantify your achievements, list your responsibilities (especially the senior-level ones), and research market rates.
- Confront Your Manager (Again), Armed with Data and Options:
- Go in with a clear, well-researched number in mind (e.g., $75k-$80k).
- Present your accomplishments and market research.
- Explain that you are a valuable asset, doing senior-level work, and training new hires who are earning significantly more.
- State that you enjoy your work and colleagues, and you want to continue contributing to the company, but your compensation needs to reflect your contributions and market value.
- Crucially, if you have an outside offer, you can use it as leverage. You can say, "I've been approached with an offer of $X, but I'd prefer to stay here if we can align on compensation." This often triggers immediate action from companies who realize they're about to lose a valuable employee.
Regarding Your Savings Account:
Your $3,200 savings account is a valid concern. This means you can't just storm out. However, it also means you absolutely need to address this pay discrepancy. Living paycheck to paycheck, especially when you're being underpaid, is not sustainable.
What if they say no to the raise and you don't have an offer?
If you present your case professionally and they still refuse a significant raise, and you don't have an outside offer, then you know their answer. At that point, you'll have to fully commit to the job search. It might take a few months, but it's essential for your financial future and mental well-being.
Final Thoughts:
You are not "bad at negotiating." You are in a common situation where companies exploit the loyalty of their existing employees. You have tangible value, and you've clearly demonstrated it by doing senior-level work and training new hires. It's time to advocate for yourself. The "awkwardness" of asking for a raise is far less damaging than the bitterness of being chronically underpaid. Good luck!