No straight path. How do I become competitive?

Hi all,

Yeah the job market right now is terrible but I am looking for some advice.

My work experience is all over the place. I have 2 college degrees, my masters in nutrition, a background in non profit work in Africa, starting my own business..it’s all over the place. I’m 31. I’m held my own business since 2022, but I’m looking to get back into the corporate world.

I’m super grateful for my awesome experiences, ability to move across country, try new jobs BUT it’s biting me in the ass.

Whenever I apply for a job, I feel like I look like a walking red flag because I have never kept a straight path with my career. I’ve kept jobs for 2-3 years max. It’s hard to be chosen when the job I’m applying for, might have much better applicants.

How do I become competitive in a job market like right now?? Am I screwed? 😩🥲

Jobadvisor:

It's completely understandable to feel that way given the current job market and your diverse background. However, your experiences are far from a "walking red flag" – in fact, they can be significant assets if you frame them correctly. You're not screwed at all! Many employers today value diverse skill sets and adaptability.

Here's how to become more competitive and leverage your unique path:

1. Reframe Your Narrative – Your "Why":

• Embrace Your Versatility: Instead of seeing your varied experience as a negative, highlight it as a testament to your adaptability, resilience, and ability to learn quickly and thrive in different environments.
• Identify Your Core Strengths: Look across all your experiences. What consistent skills have you developed? (e.g., project management, communication, problem-solving, strategic thinking, cross-cultural collaboration, entrepreneurship, sales, marketing, client relations, data analysis from your nutrition background).
• Craft a Cohesive Story: On your resume, cover letter, and in interviews, don't just list your jobs. Tell a story about how each experience contributed to your growth and led you to where you are now, specifically seeking a corporate role.
  • Example: "My non-profit work in Africa honed my resourcefulness and ability to execute complex projects with limited resources, while my entrepreneurial venture cultivated strong leadership, strategic planning, and direct sales skills. My nutrition background provided a scientific rigor and understanding of complex data. I'm now eager to apply this unique blend of practical experience, analytical thinking, and entrepreneurial drive to a corporate environment where I can contribute to [mention specific corporate goals/industry]."

2. Tailor Everything to the Role:

• Deep Dive into Job Descriptions: Don't just skim. Analyze the keywords, required skills, and desired qualities.
• Customize Your Resume:
  • "Summary/Objective" Section: This is crucial for you. Instead of a generic objective, write a powerful summary (3-5 sentences) that immediately highlights your most relevant skills and your career aspirations for a corporate role. Use keywords from the job description.
  • Bullet Points: For each past role, instead of just listing duties, focus on quantifiable achievements and skills directly transferable to the corporate world.
    • Non-profit example: Instead of "Helped people in Africa," try "Managed a $X budget to implement community health programs, impacting Y beneficiaries and improving Z outcomes."
    • Business owner example: Instead of "Ran my own business," try "Developed and executed a comprehensive marketing strategy resulting in X% customer growth and Y revenue increase," or "Managed all aspects of operations, including finance, sales, and client relations, leading to Z successful projects."
  • De-emphasize less relevant details: You can shorten descriptions for roles that are less pertinent to the corporate job you're seeking, while still showing the duration.
• Personalize Your Cover Letter: This is where you connect the dots. Directly address how your seemingly disparate experiences have equipped you with the exact skills and perspective needed for that specific job. Explain your transition back to corporate and why you're excited about their company.

3. Network Strategically:

• Informational Interviews: Reach out to people in roles or industries you're interested in. Ask them about their career paths, what they look for in candidates, and advice. This is a great way to learn about the corporate world, gain insights, and potentially discover hidden opportunities.
• Leverage Your Existing Network: Friends, former colleagues, professors, and even clients from your business might know people in the corporate world.
• LinkedIn: Optimize your profile with keywords, showcase your skills, and connect with people in your target companies and roles. Look for alumni from your universities who are in corporate positions.

4. Address the "Short Stint" Concern (Proactively but Positively):

• In Your Story: When explaining your path, you can briefly touch upon your desire for new challenges, growth, or the valuable lessons learned from each experience, leading you to your current clear focus on a corporate career.
• Interview Prep: Be ready to answer questions like, "Why the diverse background?" or "Why are you looking to return to a corporate environment now?"
  • Example Answer: "My diverse experiences have been incredibly valuable, allowing me to develop a broad skill set and a deep understanding of different operational models. Each role taught me something crucial, and ultimately, I realized my passion lies in [specific area within corporate]. I'm now looking for a long-term opportunity where I can apply my [list 2-3 key strengths] and contribute to a larger team's success."
  • Don't apologize for your path. Own it and present it as a strength.

5. Consider Your Target Roles:

• What kind of corporate roles align with your strengths?
  • Project Management: Your business and non-profit experience are excellent for this.
  • Operations: Again, running a business involves significant operational oversight.
  • Sales/Business Development: If your business involved direct client interaction or sales.
  • Marketing/Communications: Your ability to articulate your journey and connect with diverse groups could be an asset.
  • HR/Training: Your experience with people and diverse backgrounds could be valuable.
  • Consulting: Your varied experience could be a huge plus here, as consultants often work across different industries and problems.
• Look for companies that value diverse backgrounds. Some companies are specifically looking for "non-traditional" candidates who bring fresh perspectives.

You are not screwed! Your experiences give you a unique perspective and a diverse skill set that many "straight path" candidates might lack. The key is to confidently articulate how those experiences make you a more valuable, adaptable, and resourceful candidate for the corporate world. It will take effort to tailor your applications and tell your story effectively, but it's absolutely achievable. Good luck!

Is it just me, or is “loyalty” in jobs becoming a trap?

I’m genuinely curious where others stand on this—especially those who’ve been in the workforce for 5+ years.

I stayed loyal to my company for 4 years. Trained new hires, took on more responsibility, hit all my targets, and barely got a 3% raise. A friend of mine? Jumped jobs every 12–18 months, got 30–40% salary bumps each time, and is now making almost double what I do.

I used to believe loyalty meant something. That sticking around would be recognized. But now it kinda feels like I’ve been played.

Is the game really just “hop every year or two or get left behind”? Or is there still a world where loyalty pays off?

Jobadvisor

You've hit on a really common sentiment in today's job market, and you're far from alone in feeling that "loyalty" can sometimes feel like a trap. Many people, especially those with several years of experience, share your observation that job hopping often leads to significantly higher salary bumps and faster career progression than staying put.

Here's a breakdown of why this trend exists and what it means for your career:

Why "Loyalty" Can Feel Like a Trap:

• Internal vs. External Pay Scales: Companies often have a set budget for annual raises for existing employees (often in the low single digits, like your 3%). However, they're willing to pay market rate or even a premium to attract new talent with in-demand skills, as they're competing with other companies for those individuals. This creates a disconnect where a new hire with similar or even less experience might start at a much higher salary than a long-term employee.
• Stagnation of Growth: While loyalty can lead to deep expertise within a company, it can also lead to a lack of exposure to new technologies, methodologies, and challenges that come with different environments. Job hopping allows you to diversify your skillset and broaden your experience, which makes you more marketable.
• Lack of Internal Promotion Opportunities: Sometimes, even with increased responsibility and strong performance, internal promotions or significant raises aren't readily available within a company's structure or budget. New companies, however, might offer a higher-level role as an incentive to join.
• Erosion of Traditional Benefits: The idea of a lifelong career with one company, often accompanied by pensions and steady raises, has largely faded. With the decline of such traditional benefits, the incentive for long-term loyalty from an employee's perspective has also diminished.

The "Job Hopping" Advantage:

• Higher Salary Increases: As you've seen with your friend, changing jobs frequently (e.g., every 1-3 years) can lead to substantial salary increases, often 10-40% or more with each jump. This is because you can leverage a new offer to negotiate a higher starting salary.
• Faster Career Advancement: Each new role can offer opportunities to take on more significant projects, lead teams, and gain experience that might take years to accumulate in a single company.
• Skill Diversification: Exposure to different companies, industries, and roles allows you to acquire a wider range of skills and adapt to new challenges, making you a more well-rounded professional.
• Broader Network: You build connections across multiple organizations, which can open doors to future opportunities.

Is There Still a World Where Loyalty Pays Off?

While the current market often favors job hopping for salary growth, loyalty isn't entirely dead, but it looks different than it used to.

• Specific Industries/Roles: In some niche industries or highly specialized roles, deep institutional knowledge and long-term relationships are highly valued, and loyalty can be rewarded through significant promotions and compensation.
• Exceptional Internal Growth: If your current company consistently provides significant growth opportunities, challenging projects, and competitive compensation raises (beyond the standard 3%), then staying can still be beneficial. This often happens in rapidly expanding companies or those with strong internal mobility programs.
• Work-Life Balance and Culture: Sometimes, the benefits of staying with a company aren't purely financial. A great work-life balance, a supportive team, a positive company culture, or unique benefits (like tuition reimbursement, excellent healthcare, or flexible work arrangements) can make staying worthwhile even if the salary growth isn't as aggressive as job hopping.
• Seniority and Benefits: For some, long tenure can lead to valuable benefits like increased vacation time, better health insurance, or a higher seniority status that might be hard to replicate elsewhere.
• Avoiding the "Flight Risk" Label: While less common now, too many very short stints on a resume (e.g., less than a year at multiple places) can sometimes raise red flags for employers concerned about a lack of commitment. However, 12-18 months, as your friend is doing, is often considered a reasonable timeframe to demonstrate impact before moving on.

What You Can Do:

• Know Your Worth: Regularly research market rates for your skills and experience. Sites like Glassdoor, LinkedIn, and salary surveys can give you a good idea.
• Negotiate Aggressively: Whether you're staying or going, always negotiate your salary and benefits.
• Communicate Your Ambitions: Have open conversations with your manager about your career goals and expectations for growth and compensation. If they can't meet them, you'll have to decide if that's a deal-breaker.
• Keep Your Resume Updated: Even if you're not actively looking, keep your resume and LinkedIn profile current with your accomplishments and new skills.
• Be Open to Opportunities: Don't shut down recruiters or networking opportunities. You never know when the right role with a significant pay bump might come along.

Ultimately, the "game" has changed. It's less about blind loyalty and more about strategic career management. You need to be proactive in seeking out opportunities that align with your financial and professional goals, whether that means advocating for yourself within your current company or being willing to explore options elsewhere.

How to fix my life as a depressed non functioning 30 year old woman?

I’m doing pretty badly. I’m shy, I have severe social anxiety, chronic fatigue. I haven’t worked in 3 years because at my last jobs I was bullied to death by a few women and I think physically and mentally I gave up and came to live with my parents. I went to college, majored in studio art. I have only had some restaurant experience because those are the only jobs who would hire me and it was honestly so stressful and so hard on me. I have severe anxiety an adhd and I’m a very sensitive person in general. I’m at a point where I’m living at home, I don’t talk to anyone (too embarrassed to reach out), absolutely no job prospects or skills and if someone did hire me I’m so afraid of being bullied or talked about again (apparently I don’t move fast enough when I’m moving as fast as I can). I have health issues I need to see a doctor for but I’m too afraid to go and will literally have a panic attack walking into urgent care (severe health anxiety). I honestly consider kms a few times a week because I don’t even see how I can get out of this. It’s always been hard for me to have friends and function in general. To make things worse I haven’t had sex in 3 years and I am dying for physical touch.

I don’t know where to start. I’m unwell, avoiding, depressed, not sleeping, not speaking to anyone. What would you suggest I do with my day? I don’t have any support other than my mom letting me live with her (which I am lucky to have).

Jobadvisor:

It sounds like you're going through an incredibly difficult time, and it takes immense courage to articulate everything you're feeling. Please know that you're not alone in experiencing these challenges, and there is absolutely hope for things to improve. The feelings of being overwhelmed, isolated, and without direction are very common when dealing with depression, anxiety, and trauma.

Given the severity of what you're describing, especially the thoughts of self-harm, the absolute first and most crucial step is to seek professional help. This is not something you have to or should try to fix entirely on your own.

Here's a breakdown of steps you can take, starting with the most urgent:

1. Immediate Safety and Professional Help:

• Reach out for immediate support: If you are having thoughts of self-harm, please tell your mom immediately. You can also call or text a crisis hotline. In the US, you can call or text 988. In the UK, you can call 111. There are similar services available in many countries. You are not a burden. These services are there specifically for situations like yours.
• Prioritize seeing a doctor and therapist: I understand your health anxiety is severe, but addressing your physical and mental health is paramount.
  • Talk to your mom about this: Can she help you make an appointment? Can she go with you to the doctor or even sit in the waiting room? Having an advocate can make a huge difference.
  • Start with a telemedicine appointment: Many doctors and therapists offer virtual appointments. This could be a less overwhelming first step than walking into an office. You can discuss your health anxiety with them, and they can help you develop strategies for in-person visits if needed.
  • Look for therapists specializing in anxiety, trauma, and ADHD: A therapist can help you process the bullying, develop coping mechanisms for anxiety and social situations, and work through the depression. For ADHD, they can help you understand how it impacts your functioning and explore strategies for managing it.
  • Consider medication: A psychiatrist or even your general practitioner might suggest medication to help manage your depression and anxiety symptoms. This can create a foundation upon which therapy can be more effective.

2. Breaking Down Your Day (Small, Manageable Steps):

You're at a point where even small tasks feel monumental, so the key is to aim for consistency with tiny, achievable actions rather than overwhelming yourself with big goals.

• Morning Routine (aim for consistency, not perfection):
  • Wake up at the same time: Even if you don't feel like it, try to set an alarm and get out of bed.
  • Hydrate: Have a glass of water.
  • Sunlight: Open curtains, or if possible, step outside for 5-10 minutes. Natural light helps regulate sleep and mood.
  • Personal Hygiene: Brush your teeth, wash your face, get dressed (even if it's just clean comfortable clothes). This signals to your brain that the day has started.
• During the Day (focus on gentle activities):
  • Mindful Movement (very gentle):
    • Stretching: Look up some gentle stretches online. Even 5-10 minutes can make a difference.
    • Short walk: If you can, a very short walk around the block, or even just in your backyard. Don't pressure yourself for speed or distance. The goal is just to move your body a little.
  • Creative Expression (no pressure for "art"):
    • Doodling: Grab a pen and paper and just doodle whatever comes to mind.
    • Listen to music: Put on something you enjoy.
    • Journaling: You don't have to write perfectly. Just get your thoughts and feelings out on paper. This can be a safe space to express yourself.
  • One small "accomplishment" per day:
    • Make your bed.
    • Wash one dish.
    • Send one email (even if it's to yourself as a reminder).
    • Put away one item that's out of place.
    • The goal is to build momentum and prove to yourself that you can do things.
  • Limit screen time: Especially social media, which can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy and isolation.
  • Connect with your mom: Even just sitting in the same room, or having a short conversation, can help combat isolation.
• Evening Routine (winding down):
  • Consistent bedtime: Try to go to bed and wake up around the same time every day.
  • Wind-down activities: Read a book (not on a screen), listen to calming music, take a warm bath or shower.
  • Avoid screens an hour before bed.

3. Addressing Specific Concerns:

• Social Anxiety and Isolation:
  • Start incredibly small: The first "social interaction" might be a text message to someone, even if it's just "Hey." Or talking to your mom more.
  • Online support groups: While not a substitute for therapy, online groups for depression, anxiety, or ADHD can offer a sense of community and shared experience without the pressure of in-person interaction.
  • Virtual connections: If you have any old friends you feel comfortable with, perhaps suggest a video call. It can feel less intimidating than meeting in person initially.
• Chronic Fatigue: This often goes hand-in-hand with depression and anxiety. As you address your mental health, your energy levels may naturally improve. However, it's also something to discuss with your doctor to rule out any underlying physical causes.
• Lack of Skills/Job Prospects:
  • Reframe your experience: While restaurant work was stressful, you gained skills in customer service, working under pressure (even if it felt overwhelming), and possibly teamwork.
  • Focus on small learning: Is there anything you're mildly curious about that you could learn online for free? (e.g., a short course on Coursera, YouTube tutorials for a software, learning a new language for 10 minutes a day). This is about building confidence and engagement, not immediately getting a job.
  • Volunteer work (later, when ready): When you feel a bit stronger, even a few hours a week volunteering in a low-pressure environment (like an animal shelter, library, or community garden) can help you gain new skills, meet people, and feel a sense of purpose.
• Fear of Bullying: This is a very real and understandable fear given your past experiences. A therapist can help you process this trauma and develop strategies for setting boundaries and advocating for yourself in future environments. This might also involve exploring different types of work environments that are less chaotic or competitive.
• Physical Touch: This is a fundamental human need, and it's completely understandable to crave it.
  • Self-soothing: Weighted blankets, warm baths, soft clothing, self-massage can all provide some comfort.
  • Pets: If possible and you're able to care for one, a pet (even a low-maintenance one like a cat) can provide unconditional affection and physical touch.
  • Hugs from your mom: Don't underestimate the power of familial affection.

4. Long-Term Vision (Keep it Flexible):

• Don't pressure yourself to "fix" everything at once. This is a marathon, not a sprint.
• Revisit your interests: You majored in studio art. Is there a way to engage with art again, even just for pleasure and self-expression, without the pressure of it being a career?
• Small goals: Instead of "get a job," maybe it's "research one potential career path for 15 minutes this week." Instead of "make friends," it's "respond to one text message today."

You are incredibly resilient for having carried this much for so long. Your mom's support is a huge asset. Focus on taking the very next smallest step. You are worthy of help, happiness, and a life where you feel safe and capable.