Ghosted by a recruiter, should I keep applying?

I suck at keeping long stories short, so here's what happened:

Currently back to the job search grind as I look for my next era/chapter in my career after being at the same company for 7+ years, so my "hire me pls" tactics are a little rusty LOL!

I applied for a job in late February that I was a perfect fit for on paper. I got a request for an intro call with the hiring manager shortly after applying and had a positive and productive chat which led to an immediate request for a video call with the department head that the role would be answering too. The call went really well (in my eyes) and we had a good rapport beyond just corporate small talk. They said they'd get back to me within 10-14 days with their decision. I followed up on day like 13 and was told they haven't made a decision but will in the next week. I followed up again and never heard back.

This company (major apparel retailer) still has a few positions listed on LinkedIn and Indeed that are still well within the scope of my skillset and experience (8+ years in fashion marketing). I like the company and genuinely think my personality would be a good fit as well, so I want to apply for these other positions but I'm worried it'll look stupid to the hiring manager who knows my profile and clearly doesn't want to give me the time of day...

IDK where the line is between motivated vs thirsty or determined vs cant-read-the-room

Jobadvisor

It's definitely frustrating to be ghosted after what seemed like promising interviews! It's a common experience in today's job market, and it doesn't necessarily mean anything negative about you or your qualifications.

Here's how to approach your situation:

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Should You Keep Applying to This Company?

Yes, you absolutely should keep applying to other positions at this company.

Here's why:

• Recruiters handle many roles: The recruiter who ghosted you might be managing dozens of open positions. It's possible they got busy, the role was put on hold, or another candidate was chosen for reasons unrelated to your fit (e.g., internal hire, specific niche experience). Their silence for one role doesn't mean they've blacklisted you from the entire company.
• Different hiring managers: While the initial hiring manager knows your profile, subsequent applications for different roles will likely be seen by different hiring managers and/or recruiters. They might not even be aware of your previous application or its outcome.
• Demonstrates continued interest: Applying for other relevant roles shows you're genuinely interested in the company and believe you'd be a good fit for their culture and mission, even if that specific role didn't pan out. This shows determination, not thirst.
• No downside: The worst that can happen is you don't hear back again, which is the same position you're in now. The best that can happen is you land an interview for a role that's an even better fit!

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How to Approach New Applications

• Tailor your applications: Don't just resubmit the same resume and cover letter. Customize each application to the specific job description. Highlight the skills and experiences that directly align with the new role.
• Write a fresh cover letter: For each new position, write a new cover letter. You don't need to reference your previous application or interview. Focus on why you're a great fit for this specific role and this company.
• Network if possible: If you have any connections within the company (even distant ones), consider reaching out to them for an informational interview or to see if they can put in a good word for you. This can sometimes bypass the initial application screening.
• Keep a positive mindset: It's tough, but try not to take the ghosting personally. Focus your energy on what you can control: submitting strong applications and continuing your job search elsewhere.

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The Line Between Motivated and Thirsty

The "line" is crossed when you become overly persistent about a single rejection or single role. Applying for different positions within the same company is seen as motivated and strategic, especially for a large organization like an apparel retailer. You're showing diverse interest and adaptability, not an inability to move on from one specific opportunity.

Keep applying! Your perfect "next era" role could be just around the corner.

My dad is asking me to quit engineering. What should I do?

Hi, I’m a 19-year-old female studying engineering (Computer Science and Engineering) at a Tier 4 college in India. Today, my dad suggested that I switch to business studies to help him with his business. He believes that engineering has no future. However, I really want to build technology and move out of this country. My dad says that only geniuses succeed in engineering and that many average people are being let go by companies. I don’t want to rely on him for the rest of my life, and I’m not very fond of my family either. What should I do?

Jobadvisor

This is a significant crossroads, and it's completely understandable that you're feeling torn. Let's break down your situation and explore some options.

First, it's important to acknowledge your feelings and desires. You're 19, you have a clear ambition to build technology, and you want independence. These are powerful motivators. Your dad's concerns, while coming from a place he likely perceives as care, are clashing directly with your aspirations.

Here's a breakdown of what to consider and some potential steps:

Understanding Your Dad's Perspective (and Challenging It):

• "Engineering has no future": This is a very strong and generally inaccurate statement, especially for Computer Science and Engineering. The tech industry is constantly evolving and expanding. While there can be cycles of hiring and layoffs in any industry, the long-term trend for skilled tech professionals remains strong globally.
• "Only geniuses succeed in engineering": This is a common misconception. While groundbreaking innovation often comes from brilliant minds, the vast majority of engineers are intelligent, hardworking individuals who contribute significantly without being "geniuses." Success in engineering often hinges on problem-solving skills, continuous learning, adaptability, and teamwork.
• "Many average people are being let go": This likely refers to recent tech layoffs, which have been widely reported. However, these layoffs were often due to over-hiring during the pandemic boom and economic adjustments, not a fundamental lack of future in engineering. They also often targeted specific roles or companies, and the overall demand for skilled engineers remains high. Furthermore, "average" is subjective. If you're dedicated and put in the effort, you're not "average."

Your Goals and How to Achieve Them:

• "I really want to build technology": This is your core passion. Computer Science and Engineering is a direct path to this.
• "Move out of this country": Engineering, particularly software engineering, offers excellent global mobility. Many countries have high demand for tech talent and offer pathways for skilled immigrants.
• "I don’t want to rely on him for the rest of my life": A strong career in engineering provides financial independence, which is crucial for not relying on anyone.
• "I’m not very fond of my family either": This adds another layer of motivation for independence and building your own life away from current family dynamics.

What You Should Do:

1. Gather Information and Present Your Case (Calmly and Respectfully):

   • Research Job Market Data: Look up current job market trends for Computer Science and Engineering in India and internationally (e.g., US, Canada, Europe). Find statistics on job growth, average salaries, and demand for specific skills. Reputable sources include government labor statistics, industry reports (e.g., from Nasscom in India, or global tech industry analyses), and major job boards.
   • Highlight Success Stories: Find articles or examples of people who are succeeding in engineering, especially those who aren't necessarily "geniuses" but are competent and hardworking. You could even look up profiles of Indian engineers working abroad.
   • Explain Your Passion: Articulate why you want to build technology. Is it problem-solving? Creativity? The impact you can make? Help him understand that this isn't just a whim.
   • Discuss the Versatility of CSE: Point out that CSE skills are highly transferable. Even if you don't become a software developer, the logical thinking, problem-solving, and analytical skills learned in engineering are valuable in many fields, including business and entrepreneurship. You could even argue that a strong engineering background would make you more capable if you ever did decide to enter business.
   • Discuss Your College and Efforts: While it's a Tier 4 college, your dedication matters most. Explain what you're learning, any projects you're working on, and how you're trying to make the most of your education.

2. Focus on Your Performance and Skill Development:

   • Excel in Your Studies: This is your strongest argument. The better you perform in your engineering course, the more tangible evidence you have that you can succeed.
   • Build a Portfolio: Start working on personal projects, participate in hackathons, or contribute to open-source projects. This is crucial for showing practical skills and demonstrating your passion, especially for moving abroad. Companies look for hands-on experience.
   • Learn Beyond the Curriculum: The tech world moves fast. Learn new programming languages, frameworks, or concepts that are in demand. Online courses (Coursera, Udemy, edX) are great for this.
   • Network: Connect with other engineering students, professors, and professionals. Attend webinars or virtual conferences.

3. Address the Business Aspect (Strategically):

   • Is There a Compromise? Could you perhaps suggest that a strong engineering background would make you better equipped to help with his business in the future? Many successful businesses leverage technology. You could offer to learn about his business in your spare time, after you've established your engineering career, and potentially help him with tech-related aspects of his business. This shows you're not completely dismissing his wishes but prioritizing your foundational career.
   • Don't Give Up Your Path: Do not switch to business studies if your heart isn't in it. You will likely be miserable, and it will be much harder to achieve your goal of building technology and moving out.

4. Seek External Support (If Needed):

   • Career Counselor: If your college has one, speak to them about career prospects for CSE graduates, especially those looking to work internationally.
   • Mentors: If you know any engineers (perhaps family friends or alumni from your college), talk to them about their experiences and career paths. They can offer real-world perspectives.
   • Support System: Talk to trusted friends or relatives who might understand your ambitions.

What to Do in the Immediate Term:

• Don't Make Hasty Decisions: Don't agree to switch majors immediately. Tell your dad you need time to consider his suggestion thoroughly and do your own research.
• Have an Open, But Firm, Conversation: When you do talk to him, be prepared. Listen to his concerns, but then calmly present your researched arguments and reiterate your passion and long-term goals.
• Emphasize Independence: Clearly state that your primary goal is to become financially independent and self-sufficient. This is a common parental desire, and framing your engineering path as the means to achieve it might resonate.

Ultimately, this is your life and your career. While respecting your parents' concerns is important, you have to pursue a path that aligns with your passions and goals for your own well-being and future. Your dad's advice, though well-intentioned, might be based on outdated information or a misunderstanding of the tech industry. Your drive to build technology and gain independence are strong assets; leverage them.

I am so so fucking tired of working.

I (28 F) have been in the workforce since I was 15. I didnt use to mind working. I can't stand it now. Waking up and realizing I have to work today ruins my entire day. Spending 8 to 10 hours a day at a job that barely pays my bills, and barely touches the cost of my medical needs, fills me with a sense of dread I've never experienced.

I am disabled. I have an autoimmune disease and severe asthma. My inhaler alone is almost 300 a month, with my health insurance. Working HURTS. My whole body hurts all the time. If I have to work then I basically can't do anything else that day other than shower and get into the bed and hope my body hurts less when I wake up. I am so fucking tired. I am exhausted. I walk and stand for 8 hours a day and I can feel my body breaking down, but I don't know what to do about it when disability wouldn't cover a single bill. I want to start a family, but I don't know how I could work and take care of baby.

I just don't understand why it has to be this hard.

Jobadvisor

I hear you, and it sounds like you're going through an incredibly difficult time. It's completely understandable to feel the way you do when you're facing such immense physical pain, financial strain, and the emotional toll of working a job that doesn't meet your needs.

You've been working for a long time, and it's clear that the cumulative effect of your autoimmune disease, severe asthma, and the physical demands of your job are taking a significant toll. The cost of healthcare alone is a huge burden, and it's infuriating that even with insurance, vital medication like your inhaler is so expensive. The feeling of your body breaking down and the inability to do anything else after work due to exhaustion is a truly painful reality.

It's also completely valid to feel dread about going to work and to question why things have to be this hard. The desire to start a family is a natural and beautiful one, and it's heartbreaking that you're facing such significant barriers to achieving that due to your current circumstances.

While I can't offer a quick fix, I want to acknowledge the depth of your struggle and validate your feelings. You're not alone in feeling this way. Many people grapple with the immense pressures of work, health, and financial insecurity.

Given your situation, here are some areas you might consider exploring, even if they seem overwhelming right now. Perhaps just reading through them might spark an idea:

• Reviewing your current job:

  • Reasonable Accommodations: Have you formally requested reasonable accommodations from your employer under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA)? This could include things like a chair, more frequent breaks, a reduced workload, or a change in tasks that are less physically demanding. An occupational therapist might be able to help you assess your needs and suggest specific accommodations.
  • Part-time work or different roles: Is there any possibility of transitioning to a part-time role within your current company, or exploring other roles that are less physically demanding? Even a small reduction in hours could make a difference to your energy levels.
  • Remote work options: Is any part of your job, or a similar job at your company, able to be done remotely?

• Exploring other employment options:

  • Less physically demanding jobs: Are there types of jobs that require less standing and walking that you could potentially transition to? This might involve learning new skills, but there are often free or low-cost resources for career training.
  • Jobs with better benefits: While it might seem counterintuitive, some jobs, even entry-level ones, might offer better health insurance plans that could reduce your out-of-pocket medical costs.
  • Gig economy/flexible work: While these often don't provide benefits, some gig economy jobs offer more flexibility in terms of hours and physical demands, which might allow you to work when you have more energy. This would be a temporary solution at best, but it's something to consider.

• Looking into disability support and resources:

  • SSI/SSDI Re-evaluation: While you mentioned disability wouldn't cover a single bill, it might be worth re-evaluating your eligibility for Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI) or Supplemental Security Income (SSI), or appealing a previous denial, especially with the detailed documentation of your physical limitations and medical costs. A disability lawyer or advocate could help you with this process, and they often work on contingency.
  • State and local programs: Research state and local programs for people with disabilities. These can sometimes offer assistance with housing, utilities, food, or even job training, which could free up some of your current income.
  • Patient assistance programs: Many pharmaceutical companies have patient assistance programs that can help reduce the cost of prescription medications like your inhaler. You could ask your doctor or pharmacist about these.
  • Non-profit organizations: Look for non-profit organizations that support individuals with your specific autoimmune disease or asthma. They often have resources, support groups, and sometimes even financial assistance programs.

• Financial planning and budgeting:

  • Reviewing expenses: A thorough review of your current budget might identify areas where you could cut back, even small amounts, to alleviate some financial pressure.
  • Debt management: If you have debt, exploring options like debt consolidation or credit counseling could help reduce monthly payments.

• Prioritizing your health and well-being:

  • Managing your conditions: Are you connected with specialists for your autoimmune disease and asthma who can help optimize your treatment plan to minimize pain and symptoms?
  • Mental health support: The emotional toll of your situation is immense. Talking to a therapist or counselor could provide a safe space to process your feelings and develop coping strategies. Many therapists offer sliding scale fees.
  • Pacing and energy conservation: Learning to pace yourself and conserve energy throughout the day can be crucial for managing chronic conditions. This might involve breaking tasks into smaller chunks, taking frequent short breaks, and prioritizing activities.

It's clear you're carrying a heavy load. Please know that it's okay to feel overwhelmed and exhausted. Take small steps, and don't be afraid to reach out for help from medical professionals, advocacy groups, or even just trusted friends and family. Your well-being matters.